Confessions of a Grieving Mother

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.

We close our series with Finding Purpose in the Pain.

After losing a baby, the idea of finding purpose can feel impossible, especially in the early days of grief. There is no need to rush toward meaning or make sense of something that never should have happened.

Purpose can look different for everyone, and sometimes it simply means continuing to carry our babies with us as we take the next step.

As we close out Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, we hope this conversation offers a little hope to those who are still finding their way and reminds every grieving parent that there is no timeline for healing, and there is no wrong way to carry your baby’s memory forward.

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.

This week, we are talking about something that can be difficult to navigate after loss: boundaries.

Grief can change what we need from the people around us. Situations that once felt ordinary, like pregnancy announcements, baby showers, holidays, or family gatherings, can suddenly feel incredibly difficult.

Setting a boundary is not about shutting people out. Sometimes, it is simply a way of giving ourselves the care and space we need.

If setting boundaries has been difficult for you, we hope this conversation helps you feel a little less alone and reminds you that it is okay to take care of your heart.

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.

This week, we are pausing to remember our babies and celebrate the lives they lived, no matter how short their time with us may have been.

In this special Wave of Light episode, we talk about Remembering Our Babies: Honoring Their Lives and Their Legacy.

We explore the different ways families continue to honor their babies, from saying their names and creating traditions to remembering important dates and including them in their family’s story. We also talk about what it means to be a parent after loss and the lasting impact our babies can have on our lives.

During Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, we hope this conversation serves as a gentle reminder that our babies are worth remembering, their lives matter, and their stories deserve to be told.

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.

This week, we are talking about The Loneliness of Loss: Finding Connection After Baby Loss.

Pregnancy and infant loss can leave parents feeling incredibly alone. Sometimes it can feel like the world keeps moving while you are trying to find your way through a loss that changed everything.

If you have ever felt alone in your grief, we hope this episode reminds you that your feelings are valid, your story matters, and there are people who understand.

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.

We begin our series with Making Space for Grief.

After losing a baby, grief can take up more space than we ever expected. In this conversation, we talk about what it means to give ourselves permission to grieve, especially in a world that often encourages us to return to “normal” before we are ready.

If you are grieving the loss of a baby, we hope this conversation reminds you that there is no right timeline for grief and that you deserve the space to grieve in whatever way you need.

Type of loss: SIDS

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Kristen Payne and Spencer Johnston to hear the story of their son, Derrik.

Derrik was born happy and healthy on June 1. Then, in the early morning hours of June 7, everything changed. Kristen woke to feed her baby and realized he wasn’t responding. In a moment of unimaginable fear, she called 911 while Spencer began CPR. Despite their efforts, Derrik was pronounced dead in the emergency room at 4:30 a.m.

Kristen and Spencer open up about the devastating loss of their son and the profound impact it had on their lives and their relationship. Their grief ultimately changed the course of their partnership, and they now navigate life separately while continuing to co-parent their living child.

Type of loss: Neonatal loss

More about this story: In this episode of Confessions of a Grieving Mother, we talk with Kim Setterlund to hear the story of her son, Dylan, who was born at 22 weeks and 5 days.

Kim shares the unexpected circumstances that led to her premature labor after a placental abruption while she was working at a daycare. Dylan fought bravely during his time in the NICU. Despite his strength, Dylan developed necrotizing enterocolitis (NEC), a serious intestinal condition that ultimately left his doctors with no surgical option that could save his life. Kim and her family were faced with the heartbreaking decision to remove Dylan from life support.

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Tabbitha Swisher about her journey to becoming a surrogate after experiencing the loss of her son, Rosco.

After walking through the unimaginable grief of losing her baby, Tabbitha found herself facing a very different kind of pregnancy journey: carrying a baby for another family. She opens up about the complicated emotions that came with making the decision to become a surrogate, including the joy of helping another family grow alongside the fears, triggers, and grief that can accompany pregnancy after loss.

Type of Loss: Neonatal Loss

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Tabbitha as she shares the story of her son, Rosco Mack, and the unimaginable loss that forever changed her family's life.

After a healthy pregnancy and normal delivery, Rosco was born on June 28, 2019. Just moments after his birth, complications from meconium aspiration led to a heartbreaking fight for his life. Despite the tireless efforts of the medical team, Rosco died just one hour after he was born.

Tabbitha courageously reflects on those first devastating days, the loneliness that followed, and how the well-intentioned words of others often couldn't reach the depth of her grief. It wasn't until she connected with another bereaved parent and found the support of Emma's Footprints that she began to realize she didn't have to carry her loss alone.

Type of loss: Second trimester loss

More about Jenna's Story: In this episode, we talk with Jenna Lotti as she shares the story of pregnancy loss and the profound grief that followed.

In July 2025, at approximately 16 weeks pregnant, Jenna experienced light spotting and reached out to her doctor, hoping for reassurance. Instead, an ultrasound revealed the heartbreaking news that her baby's heart had stopped beating, and that the loss had likely occurred about a week earlier. The following day, Jenna underwent a D&E, beginning a journey through grief that no parent ever expects to face.

Type of loss: stillbirth

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Kaitlynn Tempalski as she shares the story of her daughter Gianna Lynn.

At 19 weeks pregnant, Kaitlynn began to wonder why she hadn't felt her baby move. Hoping for reassurance, she looked ahead to her upcoming anatomy scan, never imagining what was to come. Within moments of the ultrasound beginning, she and her husband were met with the words no parent is ever prepared to hear: "I'm sorry... there's no heartbeat."

Kaitlynn opens up about the shock of receiving the diagnosis, the difficult experience of navigating a loss without an on-site physician, and the heartbreaking hours that followed as she prepared to deliver her daughter.

Type of loss: Infant loss

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Olivia Hodge about the story of her daughter, Camila.

Olivia's journey into motherhood began with a traumatic pregnancy after experiencing PPROM at 23.5 weeks. Following weeks of hospitalization and strict bed rest, she and her husband, Armondo, welcomed Camila at 34 weeks. After spending 22 days in the NICU, Camila came home and thrived.

Olivia shares what it was like to care for Camila while Armondo was deployed, the joy of watching her daughter grow, and the memories they built together as a family.

In September 2025, everything changed. After a sudden medical emergency at daycare, Camila was rushed to the hospital and placed on life support. Olivia and Armondo were faced with the devastating reality that Camila had no signs of brain activity and said goodbye to their daughter while holding her in their arms.

More about Emma's Footprints:

• www.EmmasFootprints.com

Type of loss: Life-limiting diagnosis, infant loss, twin loss

More about this story: In this episode, we are honored to share the story of Emily Riggi and her beloved daughter, Abigail.

Emily delivered her identical twin girls at 32 weeks and quickly realized that something was different. While one daughter continued to grow stronger, Abigail faced challenge after challenge. After countless tests and a brain MRI, Emily and her family received the devastating news that Abigail’s condition was not sustainable. Surrounded by love and held tightly in the arms of her family, Abigail passed away just six days after birth.

In this heartfelt conversation, Emily reflects on navigating the joy and complexity of welcoming twins while simultaneously facing unimaginable grief. She shares what it was like to parent both daughters, to say goodbye to Abigail, and to continue honoring her life while raising her sister.

Type of loss: Stillbirth

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Kira Tietje as she shares the story of her daughter, Olivia.

During what should have been a routine 26-week appointment, Kira’s world changed forever when no heartbeat could be found. Although Olivia had a healthy anatomy scan and a heartbeat at 22 weeks, it was discovered that she had stopped growing around 19 weeks and 5 days. As a first-time mom with an anterior placenta, Kira struggled with questions and uncertainties that many grieving parents know all too well.

Type of loss: Early-term losses, Ectopic Pregnancy, Chemical Pregnancy, Blighted Ovum

More about this story: In this episode of Confessions of a Grieving Mother, Julie talks with Heather to share a story that spans infertility, pregnancy loss, medical trauma, and the complicated, enduring hope that lives alongside grief.

Heather and her husband Brian were first diagnosed with unexplained infertility at age 30, beginning a journey where grief arrived long before any loss—grief over the inability to conceive freely, over the uncertainty of waiting, and over watching others experience pregnancies that felt out of reach. After multiple rounds of treatment, they finally conceived, only to experience an ectopic pregnancy and the devastating loss of their baby, Thistle, in a medical emergency that turned joy into trauma in an instant.

What followed was a long and complicated path through IVF, embryo transfers, and repeated heartbreak. Heather shares the story of their embryos, their “double rainbow” boys born after loss, and the fragile hope that came with each attempt to grow their family. Along the way, she experienced multiple miscarriages—including the losses of Rowan, Hazel, Willow, and Sage—each one carrying its own weight of grief, questions, and longing.

Through it all, Heather speaks honestly about the emotional toll of repeated loss, the strain on her body and spirit, and the moments where she questioned whether she would ever be able to bring a baby safely into her arms again.

In this Father’s Day episode, Tracy and Julie hold space for a side of grief that is often quiet, private, and deeply felt—fatherhood after loss.

Through a series of heartfelt letters written by loss dads, they read words addressed to their babies and to their grief itself. These letters are tender, honest, and unfiltered—offering glimpses into love that has no physical place to land, and the ongoing relationship fathers continue to have with their children who are no longer here.

In this episode, Julie and Falon explore one of the most tender and complicated parts of grief: identity after loss.

Through honest reflection and shared lived experience, they talk about what changes when loss becomes part of your story and how it reshapes everything from how you see yourself to how you move through the world. They reflect on the moment it becomes clear you are no longer the person you were before, and what it means to carry both who you were and who you are becoming.

This conversation holds space for anyone who has ever wondered, “Who am I now?” after loss and reminds us that identity is not erased by grief, but deeply transformed by it.

Type of Loss: Early-term loss

More about this episode: In this episode, we talk with Laura Moore as she shares her journey through pregnancy loss, infertility, and unexpected hope.

After welcoming her son Carson, Laura experienced two early pregnancy losses just months apart. What followed was a long and painful road marked by infertility, unanswered questions, countless tests, and the heartbreaking realization that there seemed to be no explanation for why she and her husband could not grow their family. After years of trying, multiple fertility treatments, and being told they would likely never become pregnant again, Laura and her husband began praying about adoption and what the future might hold.

Then, in the most unexpected way, they received the news they had been hoping for—a positive pregnancy test. As excitement slowly began to replace fear, Laura and her family allowed themselves to dream again. But just weeks later, those dreams were shattered when they learned their baby's heart had stopped beating.

In this special birthday episode of Confessions of a Grieving Mother, Tracy and Julie are joined by a very special guest — Tracy’s mom, Jodi — as they come together to remember and celebrate Emma.

Through stories, memories, laughter, and honest conversation, they reflect on Emma, the lasting impact she continues to have on their family, and what it means to carry love and grief side by side through the years. This heartfelt episode offers a deeply personal glimpse into the way remembrance lives on across generations and how birthdays can hold both joy and sorrow after loss.

Whether you are honoring your own baby's birthday in heaven or simply looking for connection and understanding, we hope this conversation reminds you that your child will always be remembered.

In this special Mother’s Day episode of Confessions of a Grieving Mother, Tracy and Julie once again hold space for the voices of bereaved mothers by reading deeply personal letters written to their babies. Through words filled with love, longing, heartbreak, and remembrance, these mothers share the realities of carrying their children in their hearts while navigating life without them in their arms.

Each letter is a powerful reminder that motherhood does not end with loss. This episode honors the enduring bond between mother and baby, the milestones imagined, the memories treasured, and the love that continues, especially on Mother’s Day.