How To! with Charles Duhigg

Jessica is only 26, but says her memory is 'worse than my mother's.' She forgets friends' birthdays, important details at work and worries that life is passing her by. In this episode of How To!, we bring in Joshua Foer, a former U.S.A. Memory Champion who wrote Moonwalking with Einstein: The Art and Science of Remembering Everything, to help Jessica train her brain. Josh says you don't have to be a memory champion to have a superhuman ability to remember — you just have to pay attention and let your imagination run wild (the raunchier the better). Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Mike’s dream job of playing bass in a Chicago orchestra is within reach — if only he can conquer his nerves and master the audition. In this episode of How To!, we bring in Don Greene, a peak performance psychologist who’s worked with Wall Street traders and Olympic athletes, to see if he can help Mike perform his best under the spotlight. The secret? Jumping jacks, extra sleep, and watching reruns of The Office. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Owen is about to graduate from high school and has no idea what he wants to do next. Owen doesn’t seem worried, but his mom, Lisa, is freaking out. In this episode of How To!, we get help from Julie Lythcott-Haims, former Stanford dean and author of How to Raise an Adult. Julie regrets dragging her own son off to college before he was ready. Pushing your child into adulthood, she says, means asking the right questions—and then getting out of the way. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Kyle wants to sell his 50-year old family insurance business so he can finally retire. But a troublesome employee is holding him back: his daughter. In this episode of How To!, Harvard Business School professor Christina Wing tries to help Kyle figure out how to sell his company without sabotaging their relationship. But if you have to fire your daughter, is it ever strictly business? Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Thirteen-year-old Henry seems like a model son. He gets good grades, plays on the hockey team, and has a solid group of friends. But Henry’s been spending a lot more time on the internet, and recently brought up something that troubled his parents—that a woman could ruin a man’s career by accusing him of sexual harassment. Now his parents wonder what other forms of toxic masculinity Henry is learning online and in the locker room. In this episode of How To!, we bring on Peggy Orenstein, author of Boys & Sex, to share what she’s learned about how to raise a boy into a modern man. When it comes to sex and consent, Peggy says, this shouldn’t be one single talk. Instead, over the course of many conversations, help your kids understand that most media—and especially porn—does not portray sex realistically. Try to talk about intimacy in a positive way, rather than just warning your son what to avoid or how things can go wrong. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Emilia can’t stop thinking about a long-ago love affair with Ivan, a man she met in Mexico in her early 20s and dated for several years. Now, a decade later, Emilia is newly married, but thoughts of her time with Ivan pop into her mind daily, a fact she’s never shared with her husband. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Ethan Kross, a psychology professor at the University of Michigan and the author of Chatter: The Voice In Our Head, Why It Matters, and How To Harness It. Whether thinking about a past experience or worrying about the present, we all get stuck in negative cycles of thought, and Ethan has the tools to help us form a better relationship with our thoughts. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Lauren and Carlos are afraid their marriage is at a breaking point. With Carlos out of work, an active toddler to care for, and another child on the way, Lauren and Carlos are feeling pressures familiar to many newlyweds—and the pandemic has only made it worse. Can we help this couple find their way back to each other? On this episode of How To!, we bring on John and Julie Gottman, who are not only co-founders of The Gottman Institute and co-authors of Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, but also have been married to each other for more than three decades. They help Lauren and Carlos begin to heal their relationship with tips that can apply to all couples. For starters, you are not your partner’s therapist, Julie says. Looking for patterns in their behavior will only drive you further away from understanding each other. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Is there a right way to let kids struggle and fail? How do you raise resilient children? And most important, when should you help out, and when should you chill out? We ask Wendy Mogel, author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee to advise a Portland, Oregon, couple who worry about their son becoming upset when he gets wet in a squirt-gun fight. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Sophie Power once breastfed her newborn during an ultramarathon, but an upcoming 268-mile race across a remote stretch of Great Britain is freaking her out. We turn to Wim Hof, aka "The Iceman," for advice. Because when you are worried about pain, you should definitely consult a Dutch extreme athlete who sits in freezing water for fun. (Really!) This is a great episode for anyone who is scared up taking up a running habit, or any other exercise (or who just loves hearing about how to withstand pain). Enjoy! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Matt has anxiety attacks. Every day. When he gets too many texts, when he starts worrying about his family, when the unexpected occurs—that’s when the sweat starts and his mind begins racing. He’s a strong guy—he was a cop—but he thinks today’s problem is connected to a tragic event in the past, and he doesn’t know what to do. We introduce him to Ben Michaelis, a clinical psychologist and habit expert, to help Matt figure out what’s triggering his anxiety attacks and how he can get back control over his head—and his life. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Ben, also know as "Sleepless in San Francisco" hasn't been able to get a good night's rest for over a decade. He's tried noise machines, medication, vodka, even eating cheese -- but nothing has worked. In this episode of How To!, we bring in Andy Puddicombe, a former Buddhist monk and co-founder of the meditation app Headspace, to help Ben hit the hay. Plus, some new information from the frontiers of sleep from your host, Charles Duhigg!

Learn more about Sleep at Charles Duhigg's newsletter, The Science of Better! You can find it here: https://charlesduhigg.substack.com/p/the-science-of-sleep-how-to-slay

Do you have a burning question or a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at charles@charlesduhigg.com. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com
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Jami's dealt with chronic knee instability and dislocations since childhood, two major surgeries, years of tedious rehab. Now she wants to actually trust her body again before starting a family, not just tolerate it. She talks to Tom Morrison, a mobility coach who thinks most people rehab wrong: too much isolating single muscles in a gym, not enough moving joints through their full range the way real life demands. His fix is almost annoyingly simple, five minutes a day, household stairs, some deliberate fidgeting, nothing that looks like a workout. He also digs into why recovering athletes sabotage themselves without realizing it, pushing hard in the gym while skipping the boring daily movement that's actually doing the real work.

Click Here to learn more about Tom Morrison

Executive Producer Corey Wara

Edited by Geoff Craig

Booking by Ben Astaire

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Amateur cyclist and university associate professor Wendy loves riding her bike with her young son and local road group, but aggressive drivers, close calls, and a deep-seated hostility toward cyclists leave her fearing for their safety on the road. Enter Meredith Glaser, CEO of the Urban Cycling Institute and professor of cycling at Ghent University, who advocates for shifting away from defensive cycling culture and toward treating bikes as everyday appliances rather than radical political statements. She introduces Wendy to the power of temporary "street experiments" and community-led initiatives like the "bicibus" or "kidical mass," advising her to leverage grassroots momentum, youth health messaging, and local allies (including cycling police officers) to reclaim public streets, foster safer road habits, and normalize bike transit without getting bogged down in municipal bureaucracy.

Meredith Glaser is the CEO of the Urban Cycling Institute and a leading expert on human-scale mobility. Head over to https://urbancyclinginstitute.org/ to learn more. They also have a substack - Urban Cycling Institute | Substack

Executive Producer Corey Wara

Edited by Geoff Craig

Booking by Ben Astaire

Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at howto@mikepesca.com and we will consider your topic for the show.

For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/

Follow us on Social Media:⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/pescagist/ X https://x.com/pescami YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@pescagist⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@pescagist

To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠ad-sales@libsyn.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto

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Last week, our expert Arthur Brooks gave us some surefire advice for resetting the parent-child relationship so your kids don't treat you like an emotional ATM. On this episode of How To!, he's going to teach our listener, Karen, how to balance the books, so to speak, by taking some withdrawals of her own. He has some surprising tips for how to restrain yourself from swooping in to save the day when it would be better to let them figure it out. Starting with a hilarious story of the time Arthur's adult son called him—pantsless—from Las Vegas. If you liked this episode, check out part one: "How To Parent Less." Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show.

Executive Producer Corey Wara

Edited by Geoff Craig

Booking by Ben Astaire

Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at howto@mikepesca.com and we will consider your topic for the show.

For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/

Follow us on Social Media:⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/pescagist/ X https://x.com/pescami YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@pescagist⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@pescagist

To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠ad-sales@libsyn.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto

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Today on How To!, Freddy, a physician, scientist, and father, struggles with how to mentor his 12-year-old daughter, who prefers her safe comfort zone and strongly resists new experiences, travel, or unfamiliar foods. Host Mike Pesca brings on stand-up comedian and Parenting is a Joke podcast host Ophira Eisenberg to discuss strategies for nudging risk-averse kids to embrace uncertainty without overwhelming them. They explore why today's deluge of technology and abundance creates unique parenting hurdles, how to gamify trying new things, and the shift away from gentle parenting toward tougher love approaches like "FAFO." Plus, is pushing kids outside their comfort zone the key to preparing them for an unpredictable future, or should parents learn to accept their child's natural boundaries?

Executive Producer Corey Wara

Edited by Geoff Craig

Booking by Ben Astaire

Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at howto@mikepesca.com and we will consider your topic for the show.

For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/

Follow us on Social Media:⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/pescagist/ X https://x.com/pescami YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@pescagist⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@pescagist

To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠ad-sales@libsyn.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto

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Today on How To!, Michael, a retired FDNY captain who used to rely on a uniform every day, finds himself staring blankly into his closet and canceling dates because he does not know how to dress. Host Mike Pesca brings on Tavia Sharp, an executive image and personal brand strategist and founder of Styled Sharp, to help Michael navigate post-retirement style, move past 1990s baggy clothing trends, and overcome the challenge of finding proper-fitting clothes as a shorter guy. They discuss the concept of building a practical "capsule wardrobe," why you shouldn't blindly trust store clerks who call themselves stylists, and how to shop for your specific body type. Plus, is adopting a color palette and finding your "season" actually helpful advice, or just unnecessary over-complication?

Executive Producer Corey Wara

Edited by Geoff Craig

Booking by Ben Astaire

Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at howto@mikepesca.com and we will consider your topic for the show.

For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/

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To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠ad-sales@libsyn.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto

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Comedian and Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! panelist Paula Poundstone splits her time among a grueling tour schedule and a chaotic home life, but she wants to find the focus necessary to manage her household staff and stop letting her deep aversion to conflict ruin her business. Enter Nedra Glover Tawwab, relationship expert and author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace, who advocates for establishing extreme clarity and asserting direct workplace rules rather than falling into the trap of passive-aggressive avoidance. She introduces Paula to an evaluation rubric for vetting potential employees, advising her to utilize trial workdays and custom hiring assessmentsShe exposes the traps of management neglect that trick empathetic bosses into prioritizing an applicant's personal hardships over their actual ability to complete high-stakes tasks.

Executive Producer Corey Wara

Edited by Geoff Craig

Booking by Ben Astaire

Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at howto@mikepesca.com and we will consider your topic for the show.

For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/

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To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠ad-sales@libsyn.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Originally Aired on Oct 12, 2021 On this episode of How To!, the second in a two part-series, Dan Christensen, a bus driver in Portland, Oregon, and Matt Smith, a crisis intervention trainer and the co-founder of Aegis Training Solutions, are back to teach you what to do when a fight is already underway. Dan talks about his experience with the 2017 Portland train attack that left two people dead. How do you stay safe? What is your responsibility to those around you? In short, how can you be a better bystander?

If you liked this episode, check out: "How To Have a Fight That Actually Helps Your Relationship."

Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

Podcast production by Derek John and Rosemary Belson.

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Ofra splits her time among a number of hobbies in her retirement, but she wants to stop feeling rudderless and find the focus necessary to write a book of observational humor based on her twenty-year career as a psychotherapist. Enter David Epstein, workplace researcher and author of Inside the Box, who advocates for creating artificial structure and imposing concrete deadlines rather than falling into the trap of endless optionality. He introduces Ofra to an evaluation rubric for vetting creative output, advising her to write a mock press release before starting her project to define her audience and clarify the exact parenting misconceptions she wants to target. He exposes the traps of subtraction neglect that trick retirees into adding too many low-stakes activities to their daily routines.

Executive Producer Corey Wara

Edited by Geoff Craig

Booking by Ben Astaire

Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at howto@mikepesca.com and we will consider your topic for the show.

For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/

Follow us on Social Media:⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/pescagist/ X https://x.com/pescami YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@pescagist⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@pescagist

To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠ad-sales@libsyn.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

India splits her time between contract production and agency work, but she wants to stop prioritizing other people's projects to scale her personal brand. Enter Simone Stolzoff, workplace researcher and author of The Good Enough Job, who advocates for building a multi-pronged freelance career rather than recklessly burning your ships. He introduces India to an evaluation rubric for vetting new business, advising her to decline any corporate opportunity that does not offer either a premium payout or a clear brand-building advantage. He exposes the traps of vocational awe that trick creatives into accepting less than they deserve, warns her about the exhausting grind of narrow algorithmic niches, and hands her a data-driven framework to prototype and prune her various income streams as her professional goals evolve.

Executive Producer Corey Wara

Edited by Geoff Craig

Booking by Ben Astaire

Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at howto@mikepesca.com and we will consider your topic for the show.

For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/

Follow us on Social Media:⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/pescagist/ X https://x.com/pescami YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@pescagist⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@pescagist

To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠ad-sales@libsyn.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.