Podcast

Teach Me How To Adult

From Frequency Podcast Network Business, Careers, Education, Self-Improvement

Teach Me How To Adult tackles the deep questions that help us know ourselves, and each other, a little better… how do we have better conversations? How do we grow together in our relationships, instead of apart? How do we stay optimistic when the world is a dumpster fire? Are we really in a loneliness epidemic? How do we cultivate more awe? Why are everyone’s hormones so out of whack? Is everyone having more sex than me?

Join host and writer Gillian Berner every week for expert interviews and meaningful conversations on the growth, changes, and transitions of adulthood. Wherever you are on your journey, we’re here to figure out the messiness of being human, together.

Self-Improvement chart
#99
Episodes
404
Releases
Twice a week
Typical length
14 min
On air since
2020
Latest episode
1 day ago

Episodes

404 episodes, newest first

  1. ICYMI: Stuck In Dating? A Framework To Overcome Common Self-Sabotaging Patterns, with Amy Chan

    Season 6, Episode 403

    Show notes

    If modern dating feels like an episode of Black Mirror, you're not alone. So we're throwing it back to dating advice that can help you date smarter and build healthy relationships that last.

    Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed.

    Relationship expert Amy Chan breaks down the toxic dating patterns that can keep people from finding the relationships they want, the mistakes singles are most commonly making, and how to stop self-sabotaging your love life. Plus, Amy’s Dating Funnel framework for approaching your dating life with clarity and confidence.

    Amy has been a trusted voice in modern relationships for almost two decades. She’s the author of UNSINGLE: How to Date Smarter and Create Love that Lasts (which comes out this April 28th!) and her popular first book, Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart, was featured in The New York Times. She’s the founder Renew Breakup Bootcamp, the world's first heartbreak retreat, and she’s on faculty at Esalen and The Omega Institute.

    Listen to the full episode with Amy here!

    Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.

    Follow Amy on Instagram and her website.

    You can order her new book, Unsingle, here.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    7 min
  2. How to Stop Overthinking Decisions and Trust Yourself, with Therapist Jenna Overbaugh

    Season 6, Episode 402

    Show notes

    Why is it so damn hard to make decisions? And why are we so afraid of making the wrong choice? If you overthink every option, struggle with decision anxiety, second-guess yourself, or feel like you’re always chasing 100% certainty, this episode is for you.

    Whether you’re questioning your relationship, contemplating a career change, navigating a major life transition, or struggling with everyday choices, the fear of making the wrong decision can feel paralyzing. So I called in licensed therapist, Jenna Overbaugh, to talk about overcoming analysis, ending the anxiety loop that keeps us stuck in decision-making, and building the confidence and self-trust to stick to our decisions… even when we feel uncertain. My biggest takeaway? Self-trust isn't knowing you'll make the "perfect" decision — it's knowing you can handle the consequences of an imperfect one.

    We explore the fantasy of the “perfect life”, why endlessly researching, analyzing, and seeking reassurance can worsen decision anxiety, how cognitive distortions can skew our perception of our options, and how to build your tolerance for uncertainty.

    The goal isn't to make decisions you’ll never regret. It’s to become someone who trusts themselves to handle uncertainty, discomfort, and whatever happens next. By the end of this episode, I hope you’ll have a roadmap for developing self-trust, without waiting until you feel completely ready.

    Jenna Overbaugh is an internationally recognized expert in OCD, anxiety disorders, and intrusive thoughts. She has worked at world-renowned treatment facilities, and her work reaches hundreds of thousands of people through her courses, her popular social media channels, and her podcast/Substack. Her debut book, Making Peace With A Noise Mind, is coming this February.

    Tune in to learn about:

    • Decision anxiety and analysis paralysis: why we get stuck trying to find the perfect choice
    • How to overcome the fear of making the wrong decision, and choose based on your values
    • How to distinguish your feelings and intuition from your anxiety
    • How to build self-trust and increase your tolerance discomfort
    • What to do when your brain gets stuck in “what if” thinking
    • How to tell the difference between productive problem-solving and overthinking or rumination
    • How to navigate doubts about big life choices, like your partner, your career, or your kids
    • Understanding cognitive distortions, like black-and-white thinking and mental filtering
    • What exposure and response prevention (ERP) is and how it can help with anxiety, OCD, and uncertainty
    • Why you don't need to feel completely ready or confident before making a meaningful change

    Resources mentioned:

    https://jennaoverbaughlpc.com/

    The Yerkes Dodson Curve

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    1 hr 12 min
  3. ICYMI: The 3 Stages Of Relationships, And How To Move From Enmeshment To Differentiation To Interdependence, with Baya Voce

    Season 6, Episode 401

    Show notes

    Are you deep in the infatuation stage? Or is your relationship stuck in the power struggle of trying to change each other, trying to protect your independence, or falling into an avoidant-pursuer dynamic? It turns out, we all have to go through that phase. Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed.

    We're throwing it back to invaluable advice from renowned relationship repair expert Baya Voce, MSW, on how to move through the three stages of relationships to land in the healthy spaciousness of interdependence. We talk about the journey from infatuation, to power struggle, to disillusionment, to interdependence, with proven tools and insights for transforming conflict into deeper connection.

    If you’re in love, want love, or care about love, this is the guide we all need for working towards interdependence, and creating love that lasts.

    With an MSW from Columbia University, Baya specializes in couples counselling and MDMA-assisted couples therapy research, and is supervised by Esther Perel. Her work has been featured in a TED Talk, on Vice, Forbes, MTV, and ABC, and her videos on everything from boundaries, to using AI for therapy, to navigating jealousy, have been viewed by millions.

    Listen to the full episode with Baya here!

    Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.

    Resources & Links:
    Follow Baya on Instagram: @bayavoce
    Baya’s website: https://bayavoce.com/

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    13 min
  4. The Psychology of Trauma Responses: Freezing, Fawning, and The Unconscious Ways We Survive Traumatic Experiences

    Season 6, Episode 400

    Show notes

    Trigger warning: This episode discusses sexual assault, trauma, and survivor experiences. Please take care of yourself and skip this one if you need to.

    I’ve been thinking a lot about the Cornell 7 case recently, and how, a decade after the #MeToo movement, we’re still seeing the same backlash, criticism, victim-blaming, and lack of understanding about what actually happens to so many people during and after a traumatic experience.

    So today, in hopes of creating more compassion and understanding in how we respond to victims who experience trauma, we’re unpacking the psychology of trauma responses — and why the ways people react to fear and coercion are so often misunderstood.

    We hear a lot about the fight-or-flight response, but what happens when your body freezes, shuts down, or tries to appease the threat? In this episode, we explore the two lesser-understood survival responses: freeze and fawn. Fawning is when someone tries to stay safe by placating, appeasing, or complying with a threat. Freezing is a mental or physical shutdown that can involve immobility, silence, numbness, or dissociation.

    These trauma responses are not conscious choices. When someone freezes instead of fights, that isn’t evidence of consent. These are involuntary responses to perceived danger, shaped by our nervous system, past experiences, and the circumstances we find ourselves in.

    Whether you’re trying to make sense of your own experience, support someone you love, or better understand the psychology of trauma responses, I hope this offers some clarity and compassion.

    Tune in to learn about:

    • How trauma responses actually work
    • Why survivors of a traumatic experience may freeze, shut down, dissociate, or be unable to fight back
    • What fawning is, why we appease or comply when we feel threatened, and how people-pleasing can become a survival response
    • The shame, guilt, and self-blame that often accompanies freezing or fawning
    • How social conditioning around politeness and people-pleasing can shape women's responses to threatening situations
    • Why processing and reporting sexual assault is so difficult
    • How to respond with more compassion and understanding when someone shares a traumatic experience

    If you’re struggling with a traumatic experience, please talk to someone you love and trust, or visit a resource like http://RAINN.org for support.

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    14 min
  5. ICYMI: The Other Kind of Burnout: What To Do When Your Life No Longer Feels Like You, with Megan Hellerer

    Season 6, Episode 399

    Show notes

    What if your burnout isn’t just a sign that you’re doing too much... but that you’re living a life that no longer feels like you?

    Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. We explore the difference between burnout caused by overwork and the deeper exhaustion that comes from misalignment (AKA the fulfillment ache): performing a role, chasing success or following expectations that leave you disconnected from yourself.

    We’re joined by career coach (to ambitious leaders like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez), author, and former Google executive Megan Hellerer to learn why the answer isn’t always to do less, and how to reconnect with the things that make you feel alive through small, low-pressure experiments.

    If you feel burnt out even after taking on less and resting more, this is a much-needed reminder on how finding meaning and alignment can be the crucial missing step.

    Listen to the full episode with Megan here.

    Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    9 min
  6. How To Feel Less Overwhelmed & Make Time For What Matters, with Time Management Expert Laura Vanderkam

    Season 6, Episode 398

    Show notes

    If you feel like you never have enough time, like there just aren’t enough hours in the day, this episode is for you. Because when we intentionally prioritize and plan, even the busiest people can find more time for the things they actually want to do.

    I’ve been really struggling to get a handle on my own time lately. Between everything I need to do, want to do and feel like I should do, it feels impossible to keep up. So if we all have the same 24 hours in a day, why do some people manage demanding careers, families, relationships and personal goals, while others feel like they’re perpetually running out of time?

    Time management expert Laura Vanderkam joins me to unpack why so many of us feel constantly busy, overwhelmed and behind… and how to reclaim our time, prioritize the life we want to be living, and build a greater sense of time abundance without trying to optimize every minute with “bro productivity hacks”.

    Laura Vanderkam has spent over 15 years studying how people actually spend their time, drawing on large-scale research and her own time-tracking experiments to understand the relationship between time, productivity and our perception of busyness. She’s written multiple books including her latest, Big Time: A Simple Path to Time Abundance, in which she explores how we can shift away from a mindset of time scarcity and make more room for the things that matter. Laura also hosts two podcasts, and her work has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Today Show, in her viral TED Talk, and on shows like The Mel Robbins Podcast.

    Tune in to learn about:

    • Time scarcity vs. time abundance: Why we feel like we never have enough time, what the research reveals about how we actually spend our hours, and how to change our relationship with time.
    • Rethink your hours: Why we should plan our lives in week-long cycles rather than in 24-hour increments.
    • The biggest time-management mistakes we make: Why we misjudge where our time goes, overestimate the things we don’t want to do, and underestimate the things we want to make time for.
    • The habits of high performers: How to manage a full, demanding life, with sustainable routines and minimal decision fatigue
    • The “golden hours” you might be missing: Making better use of the most overlooked pockets of time in your schedule.
    • Revenge bedtime procrastination: Why we stay up late to reclaim our personal time.
    • Phone use and wasted time: The digital hobby that wastes our time, robbing us of our attention, real hobbies, and leisure.
    • Creating a resilient schedule: Why we should pre-schedule “rain dates” and plan for things to go wrong.
    • To-do lists and ruthless prioritization: How to decide what deserves your time when everything feels important, and Laura’s rule for to-do lists.
    • Choosing intentionally: Why the stories we tell ourselves about our time and priorities matter.
    • Complexity isn’t chaos: Why having a full life isn’t the problem… chaotic planning is.
    • Why you don’t need to choose: Laura’s philosophy on why we shouldn’t have to “give up” time with friends or time at the gym when you’re busy with work or parenting.

    This conversation goes way deeper than productivity. It’s about intentionally choosing the way you want to live. Because the goal isn’t simply to simplify or to get more done… it’s to spend more time living a fulfilling life. You may not be able to create more hours in the day, but you can rethink how you use them.

    Follow Laura:

    https://lauravanderkam.com/

    https://lauravanderkam.com/before-breakfast-podcast/

    Buy Laura's latest book here

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    1 hr 2 min
  7. Low-Tox Living: A Toxicologist's Guide To The Chemicals, Plastics & Endocrine Disruptors Affecting Your Hormones & Health, with Dr. Yvonne Burkart

    Season 6, Episode 398

    Show notes

    Why is literally everything we interact with daily made of plastic and chemicals?? And since avoiding them all is impossible, which ones are most toxic to us?

    Toxicologist Dr. Yvonne Burkart joins me to separate the science from the fear. We break down the everyday chemicals and endocrine disruptors we're exposed to through food packaging, plastics, cookware, personal care products, fragrance, cleaning products, clothing, drinking water and more—and which changes are actually worth making.

    We talk about phthalates, PFAS and “forever chemicals,” microplastics, and what the research says about their impact on our hormones, fertility, cancer risk, and overall health.

    The good news? This isn’t a doomsday episode… there’s a lot of hope to be found in just a few adjustments, and Dr. Burkart shares the biggest changes she personally made to drastically improve her own health and fertility journey.

    Dr. Yvonne Burkart, PhD, is a toxicologist and environmental health advocate specializing in reproductive and environmental toxicology. She is the author of the forthcoming book, The Low-Tox Solution: Simple Steps to Detoxify Your Body, Home and Environment, and she shares her valuable insights on her popular YouTube channel and on podcasts like Diary Of A CEO.

    Tune in to learn about:

    • What “toxic load” actually means and how much exposure we’re getting from the products we interact with daily
    • The difference between endocrine disruptors, phthalates, PFAS (“forever chemicals”), and microplastics
    • How toxins impact hormones, fertility, PCOS, and sperm health
    • Understanding toxin exposure and cancer risk
    • The surprising research on generational toxin impact, how exposure in pregnancy impacts the baby, and the potential link between ADHD and endocrine disruptors
    • The biggest everyday sources of chemical exposure, from kitchen items to fragrance, cosmetics, and laundry
    • Should we all be filtering our drinking water??
    • Which low-tox swaps to prioritize first
    • How to improve the air quality in your home
    • How long does it take for these positive lifestyle changes to show in health testing?
    • How to increase glutathione, your body’s natural detoxification system

    This is the sensationalism-and-fear-free conversation about plastics that we all need as we strive for progress over perfection.

    Follow Dr. Yvonne:

    https://dryvonneburkart.com/

    https://www.instagram.com/dryvonneburkart/

    Dr. Yvonne's YouTube Channel

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    1 hr 15 min
  8. ICYMI: Feeling Numb? Understanding Functional Freeze, and Polyvagal Theory As A Framework For Healing, with Beatriz Victoria Albina

    Season 6, Episode 396

    Show notes

    Do you ever feel numb, like you're sleep-walking through life in zombie mode? You might be in functional freeze. Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed.

    We're diving into polyvagal theory, how to recognize when you’re stuck in functional freeze (a lot of people are!), and how to use somatic tools and nervous system mapping to heal both your mind and body. If you're looking to effectively regulate your nervous system, overcome dissociative tendencies, and feel present in your life, this is a must-listen.

    We’re joined by Beatriz Victoria Albina, NP, MPH, SEP, a Family Nurse Practitioner, Somatic Experiencing and Breathwork Practitioner, and Master Certified Somatic Life Coach. Bea unpacks the hidden cost of emotional outsourcing™, AKA the survival habit of looking to others for validation, self-worth, and emotional regulation, instead of tuning into yourself.

    Listen to the full episode with Bea here.

    Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.

    Follow Bea's Instagram and podcast.

    Buy Bea's bookEnd Emotional Outsourcing!

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    10 min
  9. We're Back! Kick Off Season 6 With 6 Questions To Get Clear On Your Priorities, Identity & Who You’re Becoming

    Season 6, Episode 395

    Show notes

    We're baaaaack! Season 6 is here, we've rebranded, and we’re going deeper.

    I'm so excited to share everything we have in store this season — it's going to be less about finding the “right” answers, and more about asking better questions.

    We’re talking about self-discovery, relationships, identity, change and uncertainty, health, purpose, communication, and what it actually means to build a life that feels like your own.

    I'm kicking things off by sharing the mini identity crisis I had this summer about how I'm showing up in the world, if the way I'm spending my time is aligned with the person I want to be, and the questions I explored to reflect on how I want to move forward.

    So today, I’m sharing six prompts to help you gain clarity and insight into how you want to live, where you are right now, and what might have gotten lost along the way.

    Tune in to explore:

    • How do I want to be remembered? Is there a gap between the person you want to be and how you're actually showing up?
    • Who are you when no one is looking? Do you like the person you are when you’re alone and no one is watching?
    • What version of yourself do you miss? What parts of your younger self might be worth reconnecting with?
    • What will you miss about this chapter of your life? How can remembering that your current life will eventually become a memory help you appreciate the present?
    • What is your insecurity trying to tell you? Are insecurity, envy, and comparison clues that you’re living out of alignment or self-abandoning?
    • What stories are you still telling yourself? And what would happen if you started gathering evidence that those stories aren’t necessarily true?

    This episode is an invitation to pause, reflect, and reverse-engineer your life around these potent questions. Grab a journal, take a walk, or discuss these prompts with someone you love. You might discover something you already knew but had forgotten.

    Welcome to Season 6. I’m so happy you’re here!

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    14 min
  10. Announcement: Summer Break And Season 6 Updates

    Season 5, Episode 394

    Show notes

    A quick update to let you know we're taking a summer break from the podcast — we’ll be back with SEASON 6 in September!

    I'm so excited to share what's in store for Season 6... we have lots of exciting updates, a new look and feel, and deeper convos with brilliant and thoughtful guests.

    In the meantime, you can stay up-to-date by subscribing to the show on YouTube and Spotify to watch all the episodes... leaving a review really is such a helpful way to support the show so I can keep making this every week!

    And if you haven’t subscribed to my Substack, it would mean the world if you did. I’ll be posting more writing and insights there in the coming weeks.

    Thank you guys for tuning in to season 5 and being a part of this amazing community.

    If you have any topics or guest suggestions that you’d love to hear in season 6, please send me a message or DM. I love hearing from you!

    I hope you all find time for whimsy, community, and the hobbies that light you up this summer.

    See you in September!

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    5 min
  11. The Psychology of Whimsy: Maybe Life Doesn’t Suck… Maybe You Just Need Whimsymaxxing

    Season 5, Episode 393

    Show notes

    Finally… a happiness habit that actually works. Whimsymaxxing is everywhere right now, and for good reason. But this is more than just another internet trend… the vitality of whimsy reflects something much deeper about what so many of us are craving.

    In this episode, we're exploring the psychology of whimsy, why adults desperately need more play, wonder, novelty, creativity, and delight, and why intentionally romanticizing your life can improve your mental health, resilience, and overall wellbeing.

    In a world obsessed with productivity, optimization, and hustle culture, whimsy is becoming an act of rebellion. A much-needed pendulum swing away from over-optimizing, biohacking, irreverence, and minimalism. Whimsy is an act of hope and joy against the seriousness of adulthood and the uncertainty of current times.

    And it’s more than just vibes… whimsy is a measurable psychological strength associated with greater life satisfaction, stronger relationships, improved resilience, and lower symptoms of depression. Even more good news: it’s not a fixed trait. Research shows playfulness can be learned and developed.

    So whether you're feeling burnt out, stuck in autopilot, or wanting to reconnect with childhood joy, this episode will inspire you to reclaim the magic of life in small, meaningful ways.

    Tune in to hear about:

    • Why whimsymaxxing is becoming one of the biggest trends
    • The psychology of whimsy, playfulness, and wonder
    • How romanticizing your life can improve happiness and mental health
    • Why novelty activates dopamine and makes life feel richer and more memorable
    • The surprising research on adult playfulness and resilience
    • The power of nostalgia and reconnecting with childhood joy
    • How to break out of autopilot and make everyday life feel magical again
    • 15 easy ways to add more whimsy, creativity, adventure, and play into your life this summer

    Let’s savour every sunset, dilly dally our days away, and spend the summer being wildly impractical and frivolous.

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    24 min
  12. ICYMI: How To Be Indispensable In An AI World (And How Authentic Should You REALLY Be At Work?!), with Emily The Recruiter

    Season 5, Episode 392

    Show notes

    How do we make ourselves indispensable in a workforce where we're constantly being replaced? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed.

    In this uncertain job market, the things that make you uniquely you — like your ideas, communication skills and emotional intelligence — are becoming increasingly important for career success. So we're throwing it back to this helpful advice from Emily The Recruiter on how to incorporate AI into your job to stand out, and the soft skills that will make you irreplaceable in the current market. Plus, Emily myth-busts how much of our authentic self we should actually bring to work.

    Emily Durham—aka Emily the Recruiter—is a career coach, content creator, and host of the Clock In Podcast. With millions of views across TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube, Emily is known for her no-BS advice on how to land your dream job and deal with workplace dynamics like a boss.xn

    Listen to the full episode with Emily The Recruiter here.

    Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.

    Check out our first episode with Emily here.

    Follow Emily on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

    Follow us on the ‘gram:

    @teachmehowtoadultmedia

    @gillian.berner

    Follow on TikTok:@teachmehowtoadult

    Subscribe on YouTube

    Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    8 min
  13. How To Stay In Love: Top Divorce Lawyer On Why Marriages Fail & The Habits That Save Relationships, with James Sexton

    Season 5, Episode 391

    Show notes

    More than half of marriages end in divorce… so why do we still choose to tie the knot?

    In this episode we get profound relationship advice from a perspective you might not expect… a world-renowned divorce lawyer and authority on relationships. Because there’s a lot that we can reverse engineer from someone who has spent their career witnessing endings.

    We're joined by James Sexton, America's top divorce lawyer, and bestselling author of How to Stay in Love and How Not To Fuck Up Your Marriage. After more than 20 years helping couples navigate the end of their marriages, James has rare insight into what actually causes relationships to fail, and how we can build stronger, healthier, lasting love before the start.

    We cover the real reason people divorce, the biggest mistakes that end marriages, what the red flags are that a relationship might be unsalvageable, emotional disconnection and the toxicity of social media for couples, and advice for anyone about to get married.

    In this moving conversation, we also explore the deeper philosophy of grief and impermanence, and what we can learn about building more connected relationships from someone who has witnessed a lifetime of endings.

    Whether you're dating, engaged, married, navigating relationship challenges, or simply want to become a better partner, this episode is packed with practical relationship advice that every couple (and anyone hoping to get married one day) should hear.

    Tune in to hear:

    • The main causes of divorce after 20+ years in family law
    • How we “lose the plot” in relationships
    • The red flags that a relationship is breaking down or beyond repair
    • Why couples’ connections “go bankrupt slowly, then all at once"
    • James Sexton’s "Hit Send Now" philosophy for honest communication
    • Check-in rituals and habits to stay connected and avoid drifting
    • Why couples experience different versions of the same relationship (we’re unreliable narrators!)
    • How social media can be damaging in modern relationships
    • What grief work and divorce law taught James about love, gratitude, and impermanence
    • The most important advice James gives to anyone about to get married

    Follow James:

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    1 hr 1 min
  14. ICYMI: How Fear Can Be The #1 Relationship Killer, with Trevor Hanson

    Season 5, Episode 390

    Show notes

    How do we choose love over fear when relationships get hard? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed.

    This advice from Trevor Hanson will guide you through common communication landmines, why fear is the #1 killer of relationships, and how to move through fear by accessing our primary emotions and communicating without self-protection.

    I’m joined by Trevor Hanson, a marriage and family therapist who has helped thousands of individuals and couples heal attachment wounds and build secure, connected, confident relationships. His work has been featured by the Gottman Institute, and he’s the founder of The Art of Healing, where he teaches frameworks for transforming insecurity into emotional safety.

    Listen to our full episode with Trevor here.

    Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.

    Follow Trevor on Instagram
    Trevor's website: https://theartofhealingbytrevor.com/

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    8 min
  15. Why Your Social Biome Shapes Your Happiness: Build Stronger Friendships This Summer | Rerelease

    Season 5, Episode 389

    Show notes

    What if this summer was your most social summer ever?

    We desperately need connection. Loneliness impacts your body, mood, longevity and emotional health, and as we turn to technology more and more for all our needs, we risk missing the social interactions that fuel us. So today we're throwing it back to the concept of the “social biome” — your personal ecosystem of relationships and daily interactions — and how it can enrich your life.

    Founded by researchers Dr. Jeffrey Hall and Dr. Andy Merolla, the social biome is a framework for strengthening relationships and cultivating a real sense of community in a culture that’s starved of real life connection.

    If you're craving more genuine relationships and social connection this summer, these doable strategies can help you build your social biome and connections.

    Tune in to learn:

    • Why connection is “social nutrition” and how to feed your social health every day.
    • The Ladder of Connection framework to move from restorative solitude to strong, meaningful friendships.
    • How small, low-stakes interactions (“weak ties”) boost your mood and help you feel less isolated.
    • Using social media and technology as a way to connect rather than compare and consume.
    • Practical tips to actually make friends as an adult, nurture existing bonds, and create a supportive community.

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

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    23 min
  16. ICYMI: Give Better Feedback In The Bedroom (And In Our Relationships): A Script For Communicating Preferences, Boundaries, and Needs, with Darshana Avila

    Season 5, Episode 388

    Show notes

    How do we communicate our needs in a way that doesn't feel like criticism? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed.

    Expressing our true desires, communicating what actually makes us feel good or safe, and dialling into our preferences and needs can be vulnerable territory with a partner... but it's a powerful path to intimacy when done with care. So we're throwing it back to this masterclass in feedback, communication, and relating more intimately with Darshana Avila.

    Darshana is a trauma-informed somatic sex educator and Erotic Wholeness coach who has dedicated her career to helping people tune in to their truth, desires, and authentic relationships. Her work has been featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & goop, and she’s spent over a decade guiding people out of the cultural patterns that keep them stuck.

    Listen to our full episode with Darshana here.

    Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.

    Follow Darshana on her website and Instagram.

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

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    11 min
  17. How To Feel More Empowered & Confident: The Psychology of Personal Power + Locus of Control | The Quickie

    Season 5, Episode 387

    Show notes

    Do you feel like you're in the driver's seat of your life, or does it feel like life is just happening to you?

    Empowered people have an infectious confidence and energy, and a lot of that personal agency comes down to a powerful concept in psychology: locus of control.

    Do our choices, habits, and actions shape our future? Or are we at the mercy of luck, circumstances, other people, and forces beyond our control? Your answer has a major impact on your confidence, resilience, motivation, mental health, relationships, success, and optimism.

    In this episode, we unpack the difference between an internal locus of control and an external locus of control, why some people feel empowered while others feel stuck, and how our childhood experiences, upbringing, and life circumstances can shape the stories we tell ourselves about what's possible.

    Tune in to hear:

    • What the concept of locus of control is in psychology
    • The difference between an internal vs. external locus of control
    • Why locus of control influences confidence, resilience, happiness, motivation, and success
    • The connection between external locus of control and anxiety/depression/stress
    • How high performers often develop a stronger sense of personal agency
    • How childhood experiences, parenting styles, and socioeconomic circumstances shape our beliefs
    • Why your locus of control may differ across areas of your life
    • Strategies to feel more empowered and build confidence in your abilities

    Whether you're navigating anxiety, building self-confidence, or trying to feel more empowered in your life, this is a powerful framework for understanding how your mindset shapes your reality.

    I believe in you!!

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    17 min
  18. The Overlooked Cause Of Burnout (It's Not Stress Or Overwork) And How To Recover | Rerelease

    Season 5, Episode 386

    Show notes

    What if burnout isn't always caused by working too much?

    I've been falling back into burnout lately, and a lot of people around me have been struggling with it too. So in this throwback episode, we're exploring a lesser-known cause of burnout that rarely gets discussed: a lack of meaning, purpose, connection, engagement, and fulfillment.

    Most burnout advice focuses on reducing stress, taking breaks, and improving work-life balance... but tons of people are still experiencing chronic fatigue, emotional exhaustion, and low motivation even after taking a break and getting more rest.

    That's because burnout isn't always about overwork. Sometimes it's about undernourishment. Enter "boreout": the exhaustion that comes from chronic disengagement, lack of purpose, misalignment with your values, and not having enough meaningful experiences, relationships, creativity, or excitement in your life.

    Tune in to hear about:

    • The other cause of burnout that most people overlook
    • Why burnout isn't always caused by stress, overwork, or long hours
    • How a lack of meaning, purpose, and engagement can create chronic exhaustion
    • The connection between values misalignment and burnout symptoms
    • How technology, overstimulation, and constant productivity impact mental health
    • Why rest alone doesn't always fix burnout
    • Practical ways to create more energy, joy, creativity, purpose, and fulfillment
    • How to recover from burnout by building a life that energizes you

    Sometimes the answer isn't doing less... it's reconnecting with what makes you feel alive.

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

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    18 min
  19. ICYMI: Are You A Moderator Or Abstainer? Breaking Down Drinking Habits & How Alcohol Impacts Your Social Life, with Amanda Kuda

    Season 5, Episode 385

    Show notes

    Rethinking drinking? You're not the only one. Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed.

    We all know alcohol messes with our health, but do you know how much it gets in the way of real connection? We're throwing it back to a deep chat with Amanda Kuda on how alcohol impacts our confidence, energy, social lives and more. Tune in to find out if you fall into the moderators vs. abstainers archetype, and how to realistically change your relationship with booze.

    Amanda is an alcohol-free life coach, speaker, and author of Unbottled Potential: Break Up With Alcohol and Break Through to Your Best Life. Amanda teaches a modern, empowering approach to personal development and self-actualization through the lens of elective sobriety—no rock bottom necessary. Whether you’re looking to cut back, reassess your relationship with drinking, or explore what an alcohol-free lifestyle could do for your energy, confidence, dating life, and emotional wellbeing, Amanda offers tons of vulnerability and insight.

    Listen to our full episode with Amanda here.

    Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.

    Follow Amanda:

    https://www.amandakuda.com/

    For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network.

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

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    12 min
  20. Why Your Friendships Feel Empty, Lonely & Disconnected in Adulthood, with Psychologist Dr. Elisabeth Crain

    Season 5, Episode 384

    Show notes

    You have friends… so why do you still feel lonely?

    Friendships are more important than ever in adulthood, but they become increasingly hard to make and maintain. But we’re in a real loneliness epidemic where most adults feel unseen, alone, and disconnected *even though* they have lots of connections in their lives.

    The real reason no one’s talking about? The “depth gap” that keeps us from being truly vulnerable and connected. Because the problem isn't always that we need more friends… it's that we don't feel known by the people in our lives.

    In this episode, we're diving into the psychology of modern friendship with psychologist Dr. Elisabeth Crain. From attachment styles and friendship patterns to reciprocity, resentment, and friendship breakups, this interview is a roadmap for healthier, more fulfilling friendships.

    Tune in to hear:

    • Why adult friendships are harder to build and maintain
    • The "Depth Gap" and why loneliness is often a quality issue, not a quantity issue
    • How fear of vulnerability and rejection impact intimacy
    • Attachment styles in friendships
    • Understanding your friendship blueprint and relationship patterns
    • Fast-burn versus slow-burn friendships… why pacing matters
    • Managing reciprocity, imbalance and resentment

    • The importance of healthy criticism

    • Tuning into your body’s reaction to people
    • The art of discernment in picking the right friendships

    • Why friendships fracture in adulthood

    Follow Dr. Elisabeth Crain:

    https://www.drelisabethcrain.com/

    https://www.instagram.com/dr.elisabeth.crain

    Subscribe to my Substack:

    https://teachmehowtoadult.substack.com/

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    43 min