Was I in a Cult?

Dr. James Griffin is the only Black Muslim kid in small town Deposit, New York.

Then one day in eighth grade, the rival basketball team shows up with a whole new roster. Parents in kufis and hijabs. Kids with skin the same color as his. Could it be possible? An entire community of Black Muslims? Right here, in a town where he's always been the only one?

So James does what any kid in his position would do: he walks up and says "as-salamu alaykum."

And gets a look like he just insulted somebody's mother.

They're the Muslims of America, a group that just moved onto a compound down the road, run by a sheikh in Pakistan who, his followers say, speaks directly to God.

At first they become his friends. But being their friend isn't the same as being one of them. And for a kid who's always felt like the outsider, he wants to feel part of. Included. Just like every person does. Until eventually...

...he's at their 30-day summer camp. 4 a.m. Quran. Marching drills. Target practice. And at 15, learning how to sneak up behind a man and slit his throat.

NBD.

Soon, James isn't just hanging around the group. He marries into it, moves onto "the land," hands over ten percent of his paycheck, and builds his whole life around a man he has never actually met.

But here's the thing about cults. This community has a past.

Before it called itself the Muslims of America, it went by Al-Fuqra: a name already tied to bombings, murder, and terrorist plots.

But James knows none of that. At least, not yet...

Because eventually, the community he spends years of his life protecting becomes the exact group he needs protection from.

This is Part One of Dr. James Griffin's story. And it only gets bigger, darker and cultier from here. So be sure to stick around for Part 2 next week.

FOLLOW JAMES

YouTube → @Return2Fitrah YouTube → @Dr.JamesGriffin Book → Behind the Minbar: Confronting Sexual Misconduct in Muslim Institutions Email → emailr2f@gmail.com or jamesdrgriff@gmail.com

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Shira was the youngest of seven, the granddaughter of Holocaust survivors, and riddled with guilt. Because growing up Orthodox Jewish in Brooklyn, she wasn't supposed to question the life she'd been given.

But she did.

And the incessant amount of rules didn't help: Cover your knees. Cover your elbows. Don't wear anything too bright. Don't wear pants. Don't eat cheeseburgers. (Burgers are cool, though.) Don't question. Collars buttoned to the top. She even had to wash her strawberries a certain way.

And then the blessings... A blessing the moment you open your eyes. A blessing before every sip of water. Another when you're done. A special cup to wash your hands before bread, no talking until you've blessed it, and a five-minute blessing when you're done eating it. (Pastries get their own blessing, of course.)

But some rules weren't simply arbitrary. And as Shira got older, some rules cut deeper.

Marry within your community. Cover your hair once married. Sit separately from the men. Accept that men mattered more. Their voices counted. Their presence counted. Their authority counted. Women were expected to cover up, quiet down, marry young and have babies.

Shira is a singer, and in her world, women weren't allowed to sing in front of men. Or touch men they wasn't related to. Or even count toward the ten people needed for communal prayer.

And it wasn't dating an outsider that finally broke her free. It was one heartbreaking experience that left her questioning everything she'd ever been told was true.

But it would be almost three decades before that would happen. And along the way, somehow the girl who had spent her childhood wanting out kept trying to make herself fit in.

Because getting away from the community was one thing.

Risking losing the people she loved was something else entirely.

But when your menstrual cycle can end with your underwear in a rabbi's hands…

well, eventually you might find yourself asking:

Wait… was I in a cult?

______________

FOLLOW USInstagram → @wasiinacult TikTok → @wasiinacult

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RESOURCES National Maternal Mental Health Hotline → call or text 1-833-TLC-MAMA (1-833-852-6262) Footsteps (support for people leaving ultra-Orthodox communities) → https://footstepsorg.org/

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When we left Evie, she had just landed in Germany with Mary and Liam on a mission from "the gods" to save the world… only to have her money, passport, ID and credit cards disappear almost immediately.

And then somehow, things manage to only get worse from there.

With Evie now stranded in a foreign country, Mary takes on the role of her self-appointed "manager," setting income demands, controlling her schedule and eventually pushing her to sell her body in more ways than one... all to do what?

Give all her earnings to pay for the group to live, of course. All of it.

So how does one go from small town Texas to eventually asylum housing in Germany?

Listen to find out. This is Part 2 of Evie's wonderfully bizarre, funny, and heartbreaking story. And the moment she finally begins asking the question at the center of this entire show: "Wait, was I in a cult?"

____

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Evie was only 17 when she met Mary. First, Mary was her friend. Then her girlfriend. Then her friend again. And eventually... her cult leader.

Evie didn't know it then, but apparently there was something about Mary.

Something that got Evie to mess around with pagan rituals like a couple of bored teenagers in Texas... and eventually got Evie to complete missions from "the gods," practice astral projection, and take direction from a water spirit named Flo. All in the name of "saving Texas."

And then somehow...

... got her to QUIT HER JOB, get rid of her WORLDLY POSSESSIONS, and MOVE TO GERMANY to SAVE THE WORLD.

This is Part 1 of 2. And this is only the beginning of where this experience takes our wonderful earnest guest with an infectious laugh, Evie. So be sure to stick around for Part 2 next week.

____

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By high school, church wasn't just Shannon McElroy's faith, it was her community and her future. She was going to be a Christian counselor.

Then her youth group took her to something called "Acquire the Fire": a massive Christian youth conference that was part rock concert, part revival, and for Shannon, one hell of a spiritual high.

Before long, she'd be leaving college to join Teen Mania's Honor Academy. A year-long "internship" in rural Texas that promised purpose, ministry, and a chance to change the world. All she had to do was pay hundreds of dollars a month for the privilege of working for them... for free.

All she had to do was pay hundreds of dollars a month for the privilege of working for them... for free.

As you can imagine, what Shannon thought she'd signed up for was not exactly what she got.

Like the retreat where they simulated a prison and made her do wall sits. For Jesus.

And that was just one of their so-called "Life Transforming Events."

Now, to be fair, they did transform her. Just not the way it said in the brochure.

Twenty-five years later, Shannon, now a professor, therapist and social worker, still finds herself untangling from what one very intense year at Teen Mania instilled in her.

__________

FOLLOW SHANNONWebsite → https://www.mendedbeing.com/ Instagram → @mendedbeingcounselingllc Facebook → Mended Being

More Teen Mania stories → Recovering Alumni

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Daniella Mestyanek Young was born three generations deep into the Children of God and today, she finally gets out.

At 15-years-old, she lands in Texas with no real education, no money and no friggin' idea how life on the outside works.

But true to form, she badasses her way through it. And excels.

Somehow, the girl who escaped one extreme, hierarchical world becomes an intelligence officer in the U.S. Army, deploys to Afghanistan, and helps make history for women in combat.

But on her very first day of basic training she thinks:

"Oh... I've joined another cult."

Part Two of Daniella's incredible story is about what happens after you escape.

Because getting out of a cult is one thing.

Figuring out who the hell you are once you're free is another.

_________

FOLLOW DANIELLAHer website → Knitting Cult Lady Instagram → @daniellamyoung_ YouTube → @KnittingCultLady Her books, Uncultured and The Culting of America → here

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Daniella Mestyanek Young was born three generations deep into the Children of God, yet somehow, that was only the beginning.

She would go on to become a US Army intelligence officer, help make history for women in combat, become Harvard educated in organizational psychology, and write two books.

But first, she had to survive her childhood.

In Part One, Daniella takes us inside the Children of God world she was born into: child labor, child performers, massive communes, David Berg's increasingly deranged teachings, and a family history so complicated Daniella has a name for it... sex cult math.

And one rainy day at 12 years old, one casual comment from her mother about glasses changed what Daniella thought she knew about her own family forever.

_________

FOLLOW DANIELLAHer website → Knitting Cult Lady Instagram → @daniellamyoung_ YouTube → @KnittingCultLady Her books, Uncultured and The Culting of America → here

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At 21, Stephanie Vaughn wanted to make some extra money. Then she won a "raffle" at her gym for a free case of energy drinks.

Lucky her, that free case won her entry into one of the biggest and most influential MLMs in the world...

AMWAY.

And the Amway lead her to the LTD, the Amway-affiliated training organization Stephanie says would eventually take over nearly every part of her life.

For nine years, Stephanie chased the promise of becoming a "Diamond": financial freedom, early retirement, and the life she was told was waiting for her if she just worked hard enough.

Instead she endured control on every level, including how much she slept, when she could visit family and even... who she was allowed to love.

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Instagram: @steph.vaughan

TikTok: @steph.vaughan

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Every cult calls itself a family. Audrey's actually was one. For Audrey, there was no guru, no religious doctrine, and the only members were her ten other siblings. And the leader? Her parents, particularly her mother. But from the outside, they looked pretty "normal": a big family living in an ordinary Idaho subdivision, houses close together, neighbors on all sides. Except not one of them was ever allowed to have a friend. And eventually, they weren't allowed to have interactions with anyone outside the family. As the isolation tightened, Audrey got older and increasingly aware that the outside world looked nothing like the one she'd been taught to fear. At 18, she finally made it to community college, where little tastes of independence began to crack open everything she'd been raised to believe. And eventually, one small act of defiance would force her to make an enormous choice: follow her parents rules, or lose her family.

When Audrey finally left in 2020, she thought the separation from her siblings would be temporary. Six years later, nine of them are still living in the family home, cut off from their big sister.

So now Audrey has stopped waiting.

She's taking matters into her own hands, finding increasingly creative, and at times risky, ways to remind her siblings that she's still out there... that there is life beyond the front door.

A big, messy, beautiful world they've barely been allowed to see. And when they're ready to walk into it, their big sis will be there, waiting with open arms.

_________________

FOLLOW AUDREY Follow her story as it unfolds → TikTok @audreyinreallife

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**NOTE: This episode originally aired in 2024, but a LOT has happened inside this cult since then. None of it surprising, all of it sick, and we'll fill you in on all of it. Jason Christian was born into Gloriavale — a self-proclaimed utopic Christian community of more than 500 people on the West Coast of New Zealand's South Island. His grandfather, Hopeful Christian, was the leader. Shut out from the outside world and forced to work on the farm at the age of six, Jason was primed to live a life without actual freedom, as this group of true believers was all he knew. But when it was time for him to marry a woman in the community that was chosen for him, Jason made a different choice. ____________________________

FOLLOW US

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Everyone gathered on the deck the day Yo promised the mothership was finally coming. They waited… but alas, it never came.

In PART 2, the magical fairy tale capsizes. Laurien becomes one of Yo's chosen women, and soon finds out exactly what that costs.

And when she finally tries to leave, they abandon her at a foreign train station with a stolen passport, no money, and 25 cents for a phone call.

She got out. But getting out wasn't the end. Decades later, the experience still leaves her caught somewhere between grief and longing, showing us all just how powerful belief can be. Especially when it's backlit by yachts, beautiful people and the glistening sea.

The group, by the way, is still going strong, but mostly on land now, in an apartment complex in Ibiza. Cult paella anyone??

____________________________

FOLLOW LAURIEN Her book, The Golden Shawl → Brave New Books

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Laurien had already been in one cult before she was old enough to understand what a cult was.

At 22, she was invited onto a fleet of white "pleasure" yachts traveling the rivers of Europe, not knowing the warm, beautiful, angelic fairies gazing deep into her eyes would become her new family. And then she met the 60-year-old Frenchman leading this pleasure cruise who called himself "Yo." Yo claimed he channeled messages from extraterrestrials, and taught that beauty was the path to enlightenment, which was rich coming from a man with a belly, an open blouse and ridiculous facial hair. The rules? No meat, no coffee, no alcohol, and no sex.

Unless, of course... it was with him (how original).

In PART 1, Laurien takes us inside a French UFO-tantric-doomsday-alien-fairy-angel sex cult. A cult she knows was filled with abuse and coercion, and yet still sees as one of the greatest adventures of her life.

____________________________-

FOLLOW LAURIEN Her book, The Golden Shawl → Brave New Books

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Before Stevie Nicks. Before Lindsey Buckingham. Before Rumours.

There was another Fleetwood Mac. And one of its lead singers was a young guitarist named Jeremy Spencer.

This week, we goes deep into a strange, dark, and almost unbelievable chapter of rock-and-roll history involving early Fleetwood Mac, Los Angeles in the '70s…

And, of course, a cult.

Oh, and F-you, Uncle Jerry.

——————————————————

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In 2007, at 19-years-old, Hella had a boss who molested her at work, and no one to turn to. Then one day, walking through her university square in Amsterdam, she met a group of people full of conviction. Passionate about the injustices in the world. And passionate about doing something about it.

They were a far-left political group. A Trotskyist splinter organization called the International Socialists (aka Internationale Socialisten). They knew who was to blame (the capitalists). And they knew what it would take to fix it...

...a goddamn revolution.

14 years later, after giving them her money, her twenties, and her autonomy… after the tragic death of a fellow female comrade… Hella woke up to something she couldn't unsee:

The exact thing she'd been fighting against was running rampant inside the group that claimed to be against it.

__________________________________________________________________

FIND HELLA

You can find Hella on Facebook (Hella Baan). She said if you'd like to send her an email, go for it! ISculty@proton.me

HELLA'S WRITINGS DURING HER TIME IN THE GROUP

Hella's article archive at socialisme.nu (in Dutch) — the articles she published as a comrade, a rare window into her voice from inside the organization

REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE

Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Robert Cialdini

The Guardian's 2013 coverage of the SWP / Comrade Delta case -- Shiv Malik and Nick Cohen's reporting on the Martin Smith rape allegations and the party's internal cover-up

Monty Python's "Splitters!" scene -- the People's Front of Judea vs. the Judean People's Front

Monty Python's "meeting" scene -- where the People's Front of Judea proves you can have all the feminist rhetoric in the world and still be an all-boys club

IF YOU WANT TO GO DEEPER

"The SWP Crisis: Some Reflections" -- a widely-cited insider account of the 2013 crisis at the SWP, written as it was happening

"Apology Not Accepted" -- a 2024 follow-up from ex-members proving the pattern Hella describes is alive and well today

The Party is Always Right: The Untold Story of Gerry Healy and British Trotskyism by Aidan Beatty -- the definitive account of the abuse and authoritarianism inside one of the most infamous British Trotskyist groups, and the lineage Hella's organization descends from

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Hoyt Richards, a "Was I in a Cult?" legend, is back.

After our original three-part series, Hoyt returns to talk about Bring Me The Beauties, the new HBO documentary about his life inside, and eventual escape from, the cult known as Eternal Values.

It's a conversation about what happens after your story is out there for all the world to see. What the doc captured, what still haunts him, and how love, family, and hard-won accountability helped bring him back to himself.

And just when you thought Hoyt's story had reached its final frame, it may not be done with the screen just yet…

Today, Hoyt is an actor, writer, and producer, who works to support cult survivors and families affected by high-control groups.

FIND HOYT:

• Website (speaking, blog & cult-recovery resources): https://www.hoytrichards.com/
• Instagram: @hoytrichardsofficial

Watch his new HBO docuseries

"Bring Me the Beauties: A Model Cult" — directed by Chris Smith (Fyre, Bad Vegan, American Movie), streaming now on HBO Max. ___________________________________

FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult

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HAVE A CULTY STORY?

Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

A dear friend of the show, Hoyt Richards, who we had on the show back in 2023, has a new HBO docuseries "Bring Me the Beauties: A Model Cult" featuring his story. We caught up with Hoyt to discuss everything. But before we air that, we're going to re-releasing our original three-parter we did on his incredible story.

Before the footage, before the headlines, before the world could see the jawline for themselves, Hoyt shared his story with us.

Listen here, watch the doc, and come back next week for our brand-new interview with Hoyt about what it's like to have a hit documentary about your very personal life out there for the world to see.

THIS IS PART 3 ...

The final part of Hoyt Richards' incredible journey into and out of a UFO doomsday cult. The damning Vanity Fair article throws Hoyt's family into chaos as they attempt to intervene. And right when you think he might finally be getting out, his fellow brothers go to extreme lengths to keep their financial backer from leaving. And it works. Until it finally doesn't. Thank you again, Hoyt. He is a brave and inspirational human, and we loved having him on the show.

FIND HOYT:

• Website (speaking, blog & cult-recovery resources): https://www.hoytrichards.com/
• Instagram: @hoytrichardsofficial

Watch his new HBO docuseries

"Bring Me the Beauties: A Model Cult" — directed by Chris Smith (Fyre, Bad Vegan, American Movie), streaming now on HBO Max.___________________________________

FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult

SUPPORT THE SHOW

Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)

HAVE A CULTY STORY?

Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

A dear friend of the show, Hoyt Richards, who we had on the show back in 2023, has a new HBO docuseries "Bring Me the Beauties: A Model Cult" featuring his story. We caught up with Hoyt to discuss everything. But before we air that, we're going to re-releasing our original three-parter we did on his incredible story.

Before the footage, before the headlines, before the world could see the jawline for themselves, Hoyt shared his story with us.

Listen here, watch the doc, and come back next week for our brand-new interview with Hoyt about what it's like to have a hit documentary about your very personal life out there for the world to see.

THIS IS PART 2 ...

The now quasi-famous group takes it to the next level. They get a name, a book, a show, a hit song, and a distant star doomsday getaway. Hoyt, meanwhile, becomes his own star, modeling for millions but returning home to sleep on the floor. All is going well (or so they think) until the group puts a well-known phrase to the test. Is there really no such thing as bad press?

FIND HOYT:

• Website (speaking, blog & cult-recovery resources): https://www.hoytrichards.com/
• Instagram: @hoytrichardsofficial

Watch his new HBO docuseries

"Bring Me the Beauties: A Model Cult" — directed by Chris Smith (Fyre, Bad Vegan, American Movie), streaming now on HBO Max.___________________________________

FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult

SUPPORT THE SHOW Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)

HAVE A CULTY STORY?

Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

A dear friend of the show, Hoyt Richards, who we had on the show back in 2023, has a new HBO docuseries "Bring Me the Beauties: A Model Cult" featuring his story. We caught up with Hoyt to discuss everything. But before we air that, we're going to re-releasing our original three-parter we did on his incredible story.

Before the footage, before the headlines, before the world could see the jawline for themselves, Hoyt shared his story with us.

Listen here, watch the doc, and come back next week for our brand-new interview with Hoyt about what it's like to have a hit documentary about your very personal life out there for the world to see.

THIS IS PART 1 ...

It was 1978, and the effortlessly handsome Hoyt Richards was a 16-year-old football talent summering in Nantucket. Chasing girls and free beer was about all on this young boy's mind. So when he meets a man on the beach who was rumored to throw great parties, Hoyt thinks nothing of it. Little did Hoyt know & he had just come face-to-face with a budding cult leader that would take his life in a direction he never could've dreamed.

FIND HOYT:

• Website (speaking, blog & cult-recovery resources): https://www.hoytrichards.com/
• Instagram: @hoytrichardsofficial

Watch his new HBO docuseries

"Bring Me the Beauties: A Model Cult" — directed by Chris Smith (Fyre, Bad Vegan, American Movie), streaming now on HBO Max.___________________________________

FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult

SUPPORT THE SHOW Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)

HAVE A CULTY STORY?

Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

As Cassie on Skins and Gilly on "Game of Thrones," Hannah Murray spent years stepping into other people's pain, other people's stories, other people's worlds. But after shooting a brutal scene for a film that left her body wrecked, Hannah went looking for relief.

A trainer suggested a healer. And that healer became the doorway into a world that promised magic, ancient wisdom, secret knowledge, and above all, a way to finally heal the pain Hannah had been carrying around for years.

And as these things so often go, at first it worked.

Until it really, really didn't.

Hannah is a dream guest. Thoughtful, funny, self-aware, and deeply honest. Her memoir, "The Make-Believe: A Memoir of Magic and Madness," tells the full story, and it is as gripping as it is beautifully written.

_________________________

Hannah's Memoir:

"The Make-Believe: A Memoir of Magic and Madness," is out June 23 in the U.S. and available now in the UK.

FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult

SUPPORT THE SHOW Join our Patreon! Tyler's documentary "An Honest Liar" available now for all members! And get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)

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*CONTENT WARNING: *This episode contains discussions of child marriage, sexual assault, domestic abuse, homelessness, parental abandonment, and religious trauma. Please take care while listening.*

Married off by her mother at thirteen. Abandoned in India. Sent back to America at sixteen with a one-way ticket and a hundred dollars.

Part 2 picks up where the unthinkable left off, and follows Vilas through what comes after, which turns out to be harder, stranger, and more devastating than anyone could prepare for. But also braver, more defiant, and darkly funny.

This is a story about what happens when no one is coming to save you. About strangers who showed more decency than your own family. About becoming a mother while still needing one. About breaking every cycle you were raised inside. And about why, in 2026, child marriage is still legal in most of the United States.

Today, Vilas uses her experience to advocate for children and raise awareness about the lasting impact of child marriage and childhood trauma.

This is the final chapter to her remarkable story of resilience and reclamation. A true badass, she is.

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FIND VILAS:

Website: https://www.vilaswright.com/ Instagram: @vilaswright / Facebook: @vilas.wright

END CHILD MARRIAGE — GET INVOLVED:

Unchained at Last — Advocacy and direct services to end forced and child marriage

Tahirih Justice Center — Legal services protecting those fleeing gender-based violence

Equality Now — Global action to end legal inequality for women and girls

AHA Foundation — Protecting women and girls from forced marriage and honor violence

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