Choosing to Stay After Infidelity and Betrayal

A lot of men in recovery are doing the work: therapy, transparency, maybe even a formal disclosure. But many of them are doing it alone. They tell their partner they've "got this," and they white-knuckle their way through, avoiding the one room that might help them most: a room full of other men doing the same work.

In this episode, Hali is joined by Alonso Pool, a Certified Professional Coach and certified sex addiction specialist coach who works with men in recovery and with couples moving through full disclosure and the rupture of betrayal. Alonso and his wife, Jill, lead Hope in the Havoc, where they work with couples and individuals to bring healing and hope where damage has been done.

Together they explore why so many men hesitate to join a group, and what a man can gain there that he can't get from individual work alone. Alonso talks about how group can help deconstruct shame, rebuild relational safety and trust, and help men learn to co-regulate, and why seeing vulnerability, emotional expression, accountability, and empathy modeled by other men can offer a real template for emotional maturity.

Whether you're the partner who broke trust and you've been putting off walking through that door, or the betrayed partner wondering why "is he in a group?" matters so much, this conversation is for you.

Connect with Alonso:

http://hopeinthehavoc.com

Instagram: @hopeinthehavoc

http://facebook.com/hopeinthehavoc

Email: Info@hopeinthehavoc.com

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

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Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Join my FREE Boundaries That Build Safety Workshop

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Learn more about Reclaiming You: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners. Click the EVENTS tab on my web site for upcoming events.

If you are a navigating parenting in the aftermath of betrayal, you will find insightful information and tips on how to talk to your kids in my self-paced course called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠. I created this course alongside my daughter, Morgan Ellsworth, LMAFT, CCPS.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

"Why is she coming at me?" It's one of the most common things men say after betrayal — when their partner's pain shows up as tears, anger, a raised voice, or questions that come fast and hard.

In this solo episode, Hali speaks directly to men who broke trust and want to stay. She explains why a man's nervous system reads his partner's emotion as a threat — through neuroception, shame, and patterns learned long before this relationship — and why that reaction, while real, is almost never an accurate read of what's happening.

She then turns to the other side of the kitchen counter: what a betrayed partner's emotion actually is after a rupture like this, why her bringing it to him matters, and what it costs both partners when that pain gets defended against, avoided, or shut down.

Hali closes with seven concrete practices for staying present — from catching the first body signal to taking a break the right way — plus a clear boundary on what this episode is not saying, and a word directly to the betrayed partner who's been told she's "too much."

Written primarily for men who broke trust; betrayed partners are welcome to listen too.

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Join my FREE Boundaries That Build Safety Workshop

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Learn more about Reclaiming You: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners. Click the EVENTS tab on my web site for upcoming events.

If you are a navigating parenting in the aftermath of betrayal, you will find insightful information and tips on how to talk to your kids in my self-paced course called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠. I created this course alongside my daughter, Morgan Ellsworth, LMAFT, CCPS.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Join My Newsletter

Stay connected through my newsletter, where I share reflections, trauma-informed insights, and updates on upcoming courses, workshops, retreats, and live experiences.

👉⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Weekly⁠⁠

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

What counts as cheating if nothing physical ever happened?

In this episode, Hali sits down with Certified Partner Coach, Jill Pool to name what so often goes unnamed: the betrayal that leaves no physical evidence but reshapes a person's entire sense of safety.

This conversation holds both partners with care and offers language for a kind of pain that's too often minimized.

About the guest:

Jill Pool is an APSATS Certified Partner Coach who helps individuals navigate the complexities of betrayal recovery. As the co-owner of Hope in the Havoc (with her husband, Alonso) and a contracted coach for Hope Redefined, Jill specializes in supporting those facing unique life challenges, such as special needs parenting, homeschooling, and child loss. As a Christian, she also offers clients the opportunity to incorporate their faith into the healing journey. She develops resources that utilize straightforward language, enabling betrayed partners to express themselves more effectively. As a homeschooling mom of 12, she knows firsthand how to balance demanding family dynamics with personal healing.

Connect with Jill:

Website: http://hopeinthehavoc.com

Emotional Betrayal DNA resources: http://hopeinthehavoc.com/resources

Instagram: @hopeinthehavoc

Facebook: /hopeinthehavoc

Email: info@hopeinthehavoc.com

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

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•

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Women: Attend my FREE live weekly Workshop: Boundaries That Build Safety

MEN: Join the ⁠Help Her Heal weekly support group⁠

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Learn more about Reclaiming You: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

The Awakening The Man Within men’s Somatic Intensive is a powerful, immersive experience designed for men. This takes place November 8-11th.

Rise, Renew, Restore Retreat in Bali, Indonesia is an intimate, trauma-informed women’s healing retreat designed. Join us April 18–25, 2027, in Bali.

If you are a navigating parenting in the aftermath of betrayal, find insightful information and tips on how to talk to your kids in my self-paced course called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠. I created this course alongside my daughter, Morgan Ellsworth, LMAFT, CCPS.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

You've done the work. So why does healing still feel like something you're performing instead of living? In this episode, Hali sits down with psychologist and partner specialist Mike Tiede to unpack the difference between doing recovery and living it — and why so many couples get stuck in the gap between the two.

About Mike Tiede:

Mike is a Master 's-level, Licensed Psychologist (MA, LP) in Minnesota with over 30 years of experience, and a Board Certified Coach (BCC), helping individuals of all ages navigate life's challenges and improve their emotional well-being. His approach is grounded in evidence-based practices and tailored to each client's unique needs.

As a Certified Partner Coach through APSATS and a Certified Clinical Partner Specialist in the MPTM (Multidimensional Partner Trauma Model), Mike specializes in working with male partners who have betrayed their wives, male partners who have experienced betrayal, and couples impacted by sexual betrayal. He is also certified as a Certified Restoring Truth Disclosure Guide and a Christian Addiction Specialist International Candidate (C-SASI-C). Mike and his wife, Vicki, assist couples in all areas of recovery, with a particular focus on Phase 2 and Phase 3 work—helping couples who have established initial stability move toward deeper healing, relational repair, and genuine intimacy.

Mike integrates a trauma-informed, attachment-sensitive, and multidimensional approach to recovery. He also offers integration of Christian faith and values as a meaningful part of the healing process.

http://liferenovationcc.com/

Enjoyed This Episode?

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You⁠ is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah.

The Awakening The Man Within men’s Somatic Intensive is a powerful, immersive experience designed for men — this takes place November 8-11th.

Rise, Renew, Restore Retreat in Bali, Indonesia is an intimate, trauma-informed women’s healing retreat. Join us April 18–25, 2027, in Bali for a powerful fusion of somatic healing, breathwork, sound, energy work, Human Design, meaningful cultural experiences, adventure, rest, and connection.

If you are a navigating parenting in the aftermath of betrayal, you will find insightful information and tips on how to talk to your kids in my self-paced course called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠, created alongside my daughter, Morgan Ellsworth, LMAFT, CCPS.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

When you're trying to heal a marriage after infidelity or betrayal, it's easy for recovery to become the center of everything.

In this episode, Hali explores five ways couples can rebuild trust and emotional safety after betrayal without either partner disappearing in the process.

Whether you are the betrayed partner or the partner who broke trust, healing after infidelity isn't just about keeping your marriage together. It's also about learning how to stay connected to yourself while choosing connection with each other.

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Learn more about Reclaiming You: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah and offers a structured, trauma-informed space to understand betrayal trauma, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild self-trust.

The Awakening The Man Within men’s Somatic Intensive is a powerful, immersive experience designed for men who have already begun their recovery and self-awareness journey — and are ready to go deeper. This takes place November 8-11th.

Rise, Renew, Restore Retreat in Bali, Indonesia is an intimate, trauma-informed women’s healing retreat designed for women who have already done significant inner work and are ready to move beyond surviving into deeper joy, embodiment, and wholeness. Join us April 18–25, 2027, in Bali for a powerful fusion of somatic healing, breathwork, sound, energy work, Human Design, meaningful cultural experiences, adventure, rest, and connection—all guided by trauma-trained facilitators.

If you are a navigating parenting in the aftermath of betrayal, you will find insightful information and tips on how to talk to your kids in my self-paced course called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠. I created this course alongside my daughter, Morgan Ellsworth, LMAFT, CCPS.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

"Intimacy anorexia" is one of the most talked-about — and most misunderstood — terms in betrayal recovery. In this episode, I set out to understand it honestly, with one of the most credentialed voices in the field - Dr. Janice Caudill.

This conversation is built for couples. Whether you're the betrayed partner or the one working to rebuild trust, we look at how intimacy breaks down, how to tell the difference between active withholding and a trauma response, and what realistic, body-aware recovery can look like when two people choose to heal together. It's a grounded, compassionate, and refreshingly honest look at a hard topic — with practical takeaways you can both carry into the week.

Connect with Dr. Janice Caudill:

Janice is a psychologist, licensed through PSYPACT for tele-therapy in most states. She is a certified Intimacy Anorexia Therapist, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist-Supervisor, Certified Clinical Partner Specialist-Supervisor, Certified Partner Trauma Therapist–Supervisor and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner. She is one of the founding members of the APSATS, and participated in the development of a trauma model for partner betrayal.

Janice is the founder of Intensive Recovery Healing and Intensive Recovery Coaching. Janice and Dan Drake are the authors of his and hers companion workbooks for helping couples navigate a therapeutic disclosure of sexual betrayal:

Full Disclosure: Seeking Truth After Sexual Betrayal – 3 Volume Series

Full Disclosure: Sharing the Truth After Sexual Betrayal

https://intensivehope.com/

info@intensivehope.com

https://www.facebook.com/IntensiveRecoveryHealing?mibextid=ZbWKwL

Intimacy Anorexia Freebies: https://intensivehope.com/resources/freebies

Enjoyed This Episode?

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Learn more about Reclaiming You: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners:

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

If you're a woman and you’re doing the work — therapy, coaching, reading everything you can get your hands on — and you're still white-knuckling it alone most days of the week, this episode is for you. I talk about why healing from betrayal trauma was never going to happen in one hour a week, including from my own experience, and about a pattern I see constantly: how much of our time, money, and energy goes toward his healing while ours quietly gets put on the back burner. Then I introduce Reclaiming You, the group program built to put your healing first — with community and high-touch support to get you through the hardest days. ⁠Click here to learn more⁠.

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Learn more about Reclaiming You: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah and offers a structured, trauma-informed space to understand betrayal trauma, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild self-trust.

The Awakening The Man Within men’s Somatic Intensive is a powerful, immersive experience designed for men who have already begun their recovery and self-awareness journey — and are ready to go deeper. This takes place November 8-11th.

Rise, Renew, Restore Retreat in Bali, Indonesia is an intimate, trauma-informed women’s healing retreat designed for women who have already done significant inner work and are ready to move beyond surviving into deeper joy, embodiment, and wholeness. Join us April 18–25, 2027, in Bali for a powerful fusion of somatic healing, breathwork, sound, energy work, Human Design, meaningful cultural experiences, adventure, rest, and connection—all guided by trauma-trained facilitators.

If you are a navigating parenting in the aftermath of betrayal, you will find insightful information and tips on how to talk to your kids in my self-paced course called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠, created with my daughter, Morgan Ellsworth, LMAFT, CCPS.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

If you're rebuilding trust after infidelity, you've probably noticed something strange: small disagreements can escalate way faster and way bigger than the topic seems to deserve. A dish in the sink. A short text back. Being fifteen minutes late.

In this episode, we talk about why that happens — and it's not because either of you is being dramatic. After betrayal, your nervous system starts running everyday moments through a threat filter, not just an annoyance filter. That means ordinary conflict can carry real weight underneath it: questions about safety, about control, and about repair work that hasn't fully landed yet.

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9, 2026 in Spanish Fork, Utah.

The Awakening The Man Within men’s Somatic Intensive is a powerful, immersive experience designed for men who have already begun their recovery and self-awareness journey, and are ready to go deeper. This takes place November 8-11, 2026.

Rise, Renew, Restore Retreat in Bali, Indonesia is an intimate, trauma-informed women’s healing retreat designed for women who have already done significant inner work and are ready to move beyond surviving into deeper joy, embodiment, and wholeness. Join us April 18–25, 2027, in Bali for a powerful fusion of methods—all guided by trauma-trained facilitators.

If you are a navigating parenting in the aftermath of betrayal, you will find insightful information and tips on how to talk to your kids in my self-paced course called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠. I created this course alongside my daughter, Morgan Ellsworth, LMAFT, CCPS.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

"Separation" doesn't have to mean divorce. In this episode, I'm joined by Shawna Meek of Living Stones Coaching to talk about the therapeutic separation — a structured, intentional time apart designed to create safety and clarity for couples navigating betrayal.

Whether you're considering time apart or just trying to understand your options, this conversation offers a grounded starting point.

Connect with Shawna Meek:

http://www.livingstonescoaching.com/ or shawna@livingstonescoaching.com

Determined for More book

Six Episode Podcast Series

Get the resources mentioned in today’s episode:

⁠The Separation Plan Guide⁠

⁠Relational Safety Plan for Couples⁠

Shawna is a Professional Certified Coach, author, and coaching consultation supervisor. Her specialized focus is supporting woman experiencing betrayal trauma from problematic sexual behavior and are in a neurodiverse marriage, primarily with autism and Asperger profiles. She currently reaches those around the world through her podcast appearances, individual coaching, couples workshops, and supervising other professionals. She is also a brainspotting practitioner. She is the author of the book, Determined for More, based on her own 25 year marriage journey, available on Amazon.

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Xi1vUJPyHfeFZx1XnWNwXmG7K6BnEDNIqSxUjsPNeYw/viewform?edit_requested=truelearn more about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

In this episode of the Choosing Different mini-series, Hali is joined by her daughters, Mataia and Morgan, for an honest conversation about betrayal trauma's impact on the whole family — not just the marriage. Hali reflects on what she believed she was doing right at the time (staying reassuring, keeping hard details between the adults) and what she's since learned she missed about how her daughters were actually experiencing it. Mataia and Morgan share what that season of family trauma recovery looked like from where they were standing as kids, and how it's shaping the choices they make now as young moms of their own.

Together they talk about the protective patterns that form in the middle of survival mode, why validating both the parent's experience and the child's experience matters for real healing, and what it looks like to break old patterns on purpose instead of by accident. The episode closes with an invitation to the Becoming Together mother/daughter retreat.

Mentioned in this episode:

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Xi1vUJPyHfeFZx1XnWNwXmG7K6BnEDNIqSxUjsPNeYw/viewform?edit_requested=truelearn more about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

Get support for your children: Witnessed Group Coaching program led by Morgan Ellsworth.

Connect with Morgan Ellsworth: morgan.ellsworth98@gmail.com

Instagram: @healing.betrayed.families

Podcast: Healing Betrayed Families

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah and offers a structured, trauma-informed space to understand betrayal trauma, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild self-trust.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

If the betrayal in your relationship happened years ago — and life moved forward, but the deepest layers of healing never actually happened — this episode is for you.

Maybe the resources weren't available at the time. Maybe neither of you had the language for what betrayal trauma actually is. Maybe you got through the facts but never did the deeper grief work. Whatever the reason, when real repair gets skipped, the pain doesn't disappear — it waits.

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. I create trauma-informed resources, conversations, and learning experiences to support individuals and couples navigating infidelity, betrayal trauma, and relational repair.

Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Xi1vUJPyHfeFZx1XnWNwXmG7K6BnEDNIqSxUjsPNeYw/viewform?edit_requested=truelearn more about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah and offers a structured, trauma-informed space to understand betrayal trauma, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild self-trust.

The Awakening The Man Within men’s Somatic Intensive is a powerful, immersive experience designed for men who have already begun their recovery and self-awareness journey — and are ready to go deeper. This takes place November 8-11th.

If you are a navigating parenting in the aftermath of betrayal, you will find insightful information and tips on how to talk to your kids in my self-paced course called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠. I created this course alongside my daughter, Morgan Ellsworth, LMAFT, CCPS.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Join My Newsletter

Stay connected through my newsletter, where I share reflections, trauma-informed insights, and updates on upcoming courses, workshops, retreats, and live experiences.

👉⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Weekly⁠⁠

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com/⁠

When we talk about betrayal trauma, the picture most people carry is of a betrayed woman. But men experience betrayal too — and their pain often goes unseen, misread as anger, or dismissed entirely. In this episode, Dr. Laney Knowlton joins us to look honestly at what betrayal trauma looks like for men.

We talk about the support gap, look at the cultural messages men carry, and how those make healing challenging.

Most importantly, we talk about what actually helps and what genuine healing looks like whether a man chooses to stay or leave.

Dr. Laney Knowlton is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Supervisor and clinical sexologist with a PhD in Clinical Sexology. She maintains a private practice, Knowlton Counseling with physical offices in TX and UT and is licensed across more than a dozen states. She specializes in sexual abuse, betrayal, and problematic sexual behavior. Dr. Knowlton is the author of Healing from Betrayal, Infidelity, and Problematic Sexual Behaviors (Routledge, 2025) and the developer of the Connected Recovery® framework. She currently serves as President of the Society for the Advancement of Sexual Health (SASH).

http://knowltoncounseling.com/ & http://connectedrecoverytraining.com/

Laney@KnowltonCounseling.com

http://linktr.ee/connectedrecovery

Free Handouts

Most Recent Book

SASH podcast

Other Resources in this Episode:

Going Deeper: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction

Helping Couples Heal From Infidelity and Find Love Again

The Intimacy Pyramid

The Betrayal Shrink

Enjoyed This Episode?

Here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

You don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone.

Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Xi1vUJPyHfeFZx1XnWNwXmG7K6BnEDNIqSxUjsPNeYw/viewform?edit_requested=truelearn more about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

You can say all the right words and still leave your partner feeling completely unsafe.

If you're the partner who caused harm, that may be the most frustrating thing you've encountered in recovery — you apologized, you said "I understand," you told her you're here, and somehow it still landed wrong. In this episode, Hali explains why your partner isn't responding to your words. She's responding to your body — to whether your presence feels safe or braced, whether you're actually with her or just managing her. That's embodied empathy.

Hali walks through what embodied empathy actually is and why a traumatized nervous system is exquisitely tuned to detect the mismatch between what you say and the state you're actually in. Then she lays out two concrete lists: the behaviors that model embodied empathy and build safety (staying regulated and present when she's activated, accountability without minimizing, letting her be angry without firing back, transparency over time), and the behaviors that get in the way (defensiveness, minimizing, blame-shifting, gaslighting, withdrawal, empty promises).

Drawing on the response patterns in the book Courageous Love alongside a somatic, nervous-system lens, this episode gives both partners a clear, behavior-level map of what genuine presence after betrayal actually looks like.

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone.

Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Xi1vUJPyHfeFZx1XnWNwXmG7K6BnEDNIqSxUjsPNeYw/viewform?edit_requested=truelearn more about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

What happens when a child no longer has to convince their parent that their pain was real?

In this episode of Choosing Different Mini Series, Hali sits down with her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth, for a short, unscripted conversation about one of the most healing things a parent can offer: belief. They talk about the three quiet ways parents unintentionally dismiss a child's experience - through differing memories, good intentions, and simple unawareness - and why none of those things make a child's pain any less real.

Mentioned in this episode:

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Xi1vUJPyHfeFZx1XnWNwXmG7K6BnEDNIqSxUjsPNeYw/viewform?edit_requested=truelearn more about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

Join us: FREE Parenting Through the Wreckage Webinar on Wednesday, August 12, 2026 at 5pm Pacific

Get support for your children: Witnessed Group Coaching program led by Morgan Ellsworth.

Connect with Morgan Ellsworth: morgan.ellsworth98@gmail.com

Instagram: @healing.betrayed.families

Podcast: Healing Betrayed Families

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review — Reviews help other people in the betrayal trauma community find this podcast when they need it most. It only takes a minute and means the world.

💬 Join the Community — Connect with others who are navigating this same journey. You don't have to do this alone.

📲 Share This Episode — Know someone who needs to hear this? Send it to them. Share it on your social media. You never know who might be waiting for exactly this conversation.

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

Upcoming Group Coaching: Reclaiming You After Betrayal

If you’re ready for deeper guidance in a structured, supportive format, I am offering a group coaching program focused on healing after betrayal, rebuilding self-trust, and grounding into your values and identity—without rushing decisions about staying or leaving.

👉 ⁠Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist!⁠

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah and offers a structured, trauma-informed space to understand betrayal trauma, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild self-trust.

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉The Six Ways Trauma Hides in the Body

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Join My Newsletter

Stay connected through my newsletter, where I share reflections, trauma-informed insights, and updates on upcoming courses, workshops, retreats, and live experiences.

👉⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Weekly⁠⁠

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

What does a truly healthy relationship look like after infidelity and betrayal — and is it even possible to get there? In this episode, Hali sits down with Dr. Randi Gray, Licensed Professional Counselor and PhD in Psychology, to break down the real, practical elements of healthy relationships in betrayal recovery.

Dr. Gray has spent 12 years specializing in pornography and sex addiction and betrayal trauma, and in this conversation she gets specific — no vague advice, no platitudes. If you've been told to "set boundaries" or "communicate your needs" but never really understood what that looks like in real life after betrayal, this episode is for you.

Learn more about Dr. Randi Gray:

Dr. Gray is the owner of Randi Gray Counseling where she works as a counselor and as a board approved clinical supervisor. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor and a Board Certified Counselor. She has a Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling and her doctorate degree is a PhD in Psychology with an emphasis on cognition and instruction. She is EMDR trained and she is trained in Somatic Experiencing. She specializes in working with trauma, betrayal trauma, anxiety, depression, addiction, and improving overall self-esteem and wellbeing. She has facilitated women’s trauma recovery groups and addiction recovery, groups.

Website http://randigraycounseling.com/

And http://booksbydrgray.com/

Email randigraycounseling@gmail.com

Phone: 480 553-7743

Instagram: @randigray_counseling

Facebook: Randi Gray Counseling

TikTok: @randigraycounseling

Enjoyed This Episode?

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review — Reviews help other people in the betrayal trauma community find this podcast when they need it most. It only takes a minute and means the world.

💬 Join the Community — Connect with others who are navigating this same journey. You don't have to do this alone.

📲 Share This Episode — Know someone who needs to hear this? Send it to them. Share it on your social media. You never know who might be waiting for exactly this conversation.

Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Upcoming Group Coaching: Reclaiming You After Betrayal

If you’re ready for deeper guidance in a structured, supportive format, I am offering a program focused on healing after betrayal, rebuilding self-trust, and grounding into your values and identity—without rushing decisions about staying or leaving.

👉 ⁠Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist!⁠

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Xi1vUJPyHfeFZx1XnWNwXmG7K6BnEDNIqSxUjsPNeYw/viewform?edit_requested=truelearn more about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah and offers a structured, trauma-informed space to understand betrayal trauma, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild self-trust.

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉The Six Ways Trauma Hides in the Body

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Join My Newsletter

👉⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Weekly⁠⁠

Connect With Me Between Episodes

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

This is the first episode of the Choosing Different mini-series of conversations between Hali and her two adult daughters, who were both teenagers when their family was in the thick of betrayal and dysfunction. Instead of letting that experience pull them apart, they've been doing the slow, unglamorous work of healing, learning each other again, and trying to break some of the generational patterns they grew up with. They are upfront that they don't have it all figured out.

This isn't a highlight reel - it's a real, sometimes messy conversation, shared in case it helps open a door in your own family.

In this episode, they talk about what it means to relate to each other as two adults instead of parent and child, how to choose curiosity over criticism, navigating marriage and relationships as an adult child, supporting each other's dreams, showing up emotionally, and, at the heart of it, what healthy repair after a rupture actually looks like.

If this conversation resonated with you, we'd love for you to join us in person. We're hosting a Becoming Together Mother Daughter Retreat in Sedona, AZ, September 8–12.

Join Us: Becoming Together Mother-Daughter Retreat

Enjoyed This Episode?

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review — Reviews help other people in the betrayal trauma community find this podcast when they need it most. It only takes a minute and means the world.

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate these upcoming experiences:

Reclaimed Men’s Parts Work Intensive to heal, integrate, and live wholeheartedly after problematic sexual behavior held August 18-21st.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9th in Spanish Fork, Utah and offers a structured, trauma-informed space to understand betrayal trauma, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild self-trust.

Awaken the Man Within Men’s Somatic Healing Intensive is a powerful, immersive experience designed for men who have already begun their recovery and self-awareness journey — and are ready to go deeper. This takes place November 8-11th in Spanish Fork, UT.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.👉The Six Ways Betrayal Hides In Your Body

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Upcoming Group Coaching: Reclaiming You After Betrayal

If you’re ready for deeper guidance in a structured, supportive format, I am offering a group focused on healing after betrayal, rebuilding self-trust, and grounding into your values and identity—without rushing decisions about staying or leaving.

👉 Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist!

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Join My Newsletter

Stay connected through my newsletter, where I share reflections, trauma-informed insights, and updates on upcoming courses, workshops, retreats, and live experiences.

👉⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Weekly⁠⁠

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

You finally know the truth. So why do you feel worse?

If you're the betrayed partner and your fear, anger, and grief have grown rather than shrunk since disclosure, the first thing Hali wants you to hear is that there's nothing wrong with you. In this solo episode, Hali explains why it's common for trauma symptoms to temporarily increase after the truth comes out — and why the usual advice to "just talk about your triggers" doesn't go far enough.

From there, Hali reframes the real work for the partner who caused harm: moving into embodied empathy, managing their own triggers when their partner is activated, and learning to experience a trigger as an opportunity to rebuild trust rather than a criticism or an attack. And she anchors all of it to the foundation underneath: real, ongoing movement on making amends, because no amount of skillful trigger-handling works without changed behavior beneath it.

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Xi1vUJPyHfeFZx1XnWNwXmG7K6BnEDNIqSxUjsPNeYw/viewform?edit_requested=truelearn more about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah and offers a structured, trauma-informed space to understand betrayal trauma, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild self-trust.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Upcoming Course: Reclaiming You After Betrayal

If you’re ready for deeper guidance in a structured, supportive format, I am offering a course focused on healing after betrayal, rebuilding self-trust, and grounding into your values and identity—without rushing decisions about staying or leaving.

This course is ideal for those who want support without individual coaching and at a pace that honors their nervous system.

👉 Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist!

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

When someone betrays a partner and then starts doing "the work," the person who was hurt is left with an exhausting question: is this real, or is he just saying the right things? In this episode, host Hali Roderick is joined by psychologist Dr. Yosi Amram, known for his work on spiritual intelligence, to explore one of the most painful uncertainties in betrayal recovery — the difference between a partner who has genuinely changed and one who is simply performing accountability.

Whether you're rebuilding trust, questioning whether your partner's growth is real, or doing your own accountability work, this conversation offers a deeper lens on what authentic change actually looks like.

Learn more about Dr. Yosi Amram:

Yosi Amram, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist, a CEO leadership coach, a couple's relationship therapist, a best-selling, award-winning author, and a pioneering researcher in the field of spiritual intelligence. A former founder and CEO who led two companies through IPOs, Yosi has coached over 100 CEOs, and works with couples to cultivate passionate conscious relationships that grow and deepen their capacity for love. Yosi is a regular contributor to Psychology Today and the founder of several nonprofits including http://engendering-love.org/ and http://awakeningsi.org/.

http://yosiamram.net/

http://yosiamram.com/

http://si-relationship.com/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/yosiamram/

TEDx: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qE-Xlt6_usA

Enjoyed This Episode?

Here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),⁠complete this interest list⁠ for more information about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

The⁠ ⁠⁠Courage to Thrive Betrayal Trauma Intensive⁠⁠⁠ takes place August 25-28 in Spanish Fork, Utah.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Upcoming Course: Reclaiming You After Betrayal

If you’re ready for deeper guidance in a structured, supportive format, I am offering a course focused on healing after betrayal, rebuilding self-trust, and grounding into your values and identity—without rushing decisions about staying or leaving.

This course is ideal for those who want support without individual coaching and at a pace that honors their nervous system.

👉 Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist!

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between episodes.

👉 Instagram

👉 Facebook

👉 Website

An apology is a moment. Making amends is a process - and confusing the two is one of the most common places betrayal recovery gets stuck.

In this solo episode, Hali breaks down the real difference between apologizing and making amends after infidelity and betrayal. An apology expresses remorse, and it often marks where repair begins, but it was never built to carry the full weight of what betrayal breaks. Making amends is something else entirely: a commitment to make things right and to live differently, demonstrated through consistent, trustworthy action over time.

Hali walks through what making amends actually looks like in practice: working with a professional to build a recovery plan you can sustain, setting goals that reshape how you live, respecting your partner's boundaries, naming the values you're committing to, and developing genuine empathy for the impact of your choices. She also names the foundation the whole process depends on: staying in integrity, because a single new breach can derail months of rebuilt trust.

This episode is for you if:

•

You're the partner who caused harm and you've wondered why your apology didn't land the way you hoped — or you want to understand what real repair requires of you.

•

You're the betrayed partner and "sorry" hasn't felt like enough — and you want language for why you were never asking for too much.

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

If today’s episode resonated with you, you don’t have to walk the healing journey after betrayal alone. Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you’re craving deeper, in-person support and embodied healing, I’m helping facilitate upcoming experiences created specifically for betrayed partners.

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Xi1vUJPyHfeFZx1XnWNwXmG7K6BnEDNIqSxUjsPNeYw/viewform?edit_requested=truelearn more about my upcoming retreat - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram:⁠ ⁠@rootedandrising.healing⁠⁠

👉 Facebook:⁠ ⁠Rooted and Rising Healing with Hali Roderick⁠⁠

👉 Website:⁠⁠ ⁠http://rootedandrisinghealing.com⁠

There's a dynamic underneath a lot of disconnected relationships that almost nobody names — and when it collapses, it can quietly erode intimacy. In this episode, I'm joined by Tyler Patrick, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and co-host of the Therapy Brothers podcast, to talk about masculine and feminine energy as a relational dynamic — what it is, how it gets out of balance, and what it takes to restore it after infidelity.

Whether you're the betrayed partner who had to harden to survive, or the partner who caused harm and is trying to show up differently, this conversation offers a grounded, non-shaming way to understand what may be happening beneath the surface — and a path toward rebuilding something stronger than what was there before.

About today’s guest:

Tyler Patrick is a licensed marriage and family therapist, speaker, and co-host of the Therapy Brothers podcast. Alongside his brother Brannon Patrick, Tyler helps individuals and couples navigate addiction recovery, betrayal trauma, relationship healing, and emotional wellness through honest, compassionate conversations. With more than 20 years of experience in the mental health field, he’s known for his direct, relatable approach and passion for helping people rebuild trust, connection, and wholehearted living.

Connect with Tyler:

https://therapybrothers.org/choosing-to-stay

email: connect@therapybrothers.org

phone number: (435) 227-5272

Facebook: /Therapy.Bros

Instagram: @Therapy.Brothers

Youtube: /@Therapy.Brothers

Therapy Brothers Podcast: http://therapybrothers.org/

Reclaimed Heart Journey: ⁠https://join.reclaimyourheart.org/

Rising Son | Men's Retreat: ⁠⁠⁠https://risingson.org/

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this conversation resonated with you, here are three ways you can support the show:

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Leave a Review

💬 Join the Community

📲 Share This Episode

Connect With Me + Continue Your Healing

Here are a few ways to stay connected and continue your healing:

Download my free guide: The Six Ways Betrayal Hides in Your Body

Join the Reclaiming You Waitlist: Healing after betrayal starts with reclaiming yourself. Reclaiming You is a high touch, trauma-informed group experience designed to help you restore nervous system safety, rebuild self-trust, and come home to who you are.

Join the Help Her Heal weekly support group for men working to rebuild trust and create safety.

Sign up for my Rooted and Rising Healing mailing list to stay informed of all upcoming resources and events where we can connect.

Join me at a Retreat or Intensive

If you're ready for a deeper connection with your daughter(s),⁠sign up for my upcoming retreat⁠ - Becoming Together: A Mother Daughter Retreat - hosted by myself and my two daughters in Sedona, Arizona on September 8 - 12th.

The Revive and Thrive Somatic Healing Intensive⁠⁠⁠⁠ takes place October 6-9 in Spanish Fork, Utah.

Email Hali⁠ to join the⁠⁠⁠ Interest list for an upcoming course for parents called Intentional Parenting After Betrayal⁠⁠⁠⁠, hosted by Hali and her daughter, Morgan Ellsworth.

Free Resources & Downloads

Access free tools, guided practices, and educational resources designed to support nervous system regulation, self-trust, boundaries, and clarity after betrayal.

👉A Mini Guide to Mindful Healing After Betrayal

👉Your First Steps to Rising After Betrayal

Listen to My Other Podcast

If you are a betrayed partner, I also host a second podcast called Rooted & Rising Healing After Betrayal, created specifically for women healing from betrayal trauma.

This show offers grounded, trauma-informed conversations, solo reflections, and tools to help you reconnect with yourself, reclaim your voice, and rise with clarity and strength.

👉 Rooted and Rising Healing After Betrayal

Connect With Me Between Episodes

Join me on social media for continued conversation, encouragement, and resources between podcast episodes.

👉 Instagram

👉 Facebook

👉 Website