That's Orgasmic with Sexologist Emily Duncan

In this episode, Emily talks with Amanda Dames, the Kink Consultant, about kink, dominance, and how to explore desires safely and authentically. They discuss:

• Amanda’s journey from working as a dominatrix to becoming a sexologist and coach
• Different dominant styles, including soft dom, caretaker, and disciplinarian
• Why dominance is a skill
• How to explore kink without pretending to be someone you’re not
• Consent, negotiation, boundaries, and safe words
• What to do when partners have different interests in kink

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Amanda's Links:

• Website: https://www.amandadames.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thekinkconsultant/
• TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@the_kinkconsultant
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thekinkconsultant
• Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-kink-consultant/id1766435920
• Guide for couples with mismatched desire to have more open and honest conversations in a safe framework: https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1
• BDSM Menu for couples who are curious to explore each other's kinks: https://www.amandadames.com/bdsmlist

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Shame around queer desire does not disappear just because you want it to. If you were raised in the church and are now trying to explore dating women for the first time, this episode gives you a practical way to untangle what was taught to you from what you actually want.

Emily, a sex and relationship therapist, answers a listener question from a woman in her early 30s who feels stuck between curiosity and shame. Emily breaks the problem into two parts: how to unpack religious shame, and how to take real, manageable steps toward dating women.

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Orgasms are not a finish line - they’re a state of being, and most women/AFAB have been taught the wrong way to access them. Sex and relationship therapist Emily sits down with sensual embodiment coach Emma Swain to unpack why so many people feel blocked, disappointed, or “not orgasmic,” and how to move from pressure and performance into real, sustained pleasure.

Emma challenges the idea that orgasm is just a physical peak and breaks it open into something much bigger: emotional release, energetic expansion, nervous system safety, and full-body surrender. If you’ve ever felt like your body “doesn’t work,” only orgasms with one specific method, or rushes straight to a quick climax and drops off, this conversation will shift the way you think about pleasure completely.

Emma’s Instagram

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Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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Women are being told to wait, stay quiet, and keep their desires small, but what if pleasure could be something you choose on your own terms? Anna Grosman, founder of Her Confidant, shares how she built Australia’s only female-led agency offering curated intimate experiences for women and couples, and why more women than ever are quietly reclaiming intimacy, confidence, and connection.

From her own journey growing up in a conservative family to creating two businesses in this space, Anna opens up about the stigma she’s fighting, the women she serves, and the life-changing conversations happening before a booking ever takes place. She explains how Her Confidant works, why every client begins with a deeply personal consultation, and how the experience is designed to feel safe, respectful, and fully tailored from start to finish.

You’ll discover:

• What sexual experiences at Her Confidant look like
• How Anna matches clients with companions using intuition, experience, and careful screening
• The role trauma awareness, consent, and trust play in creating a safe sexual experience
• Why some clients say this experience has done more for them than years of therapy
• How intimacy, touch, and pleasure can support confidence at every age

Anna Grosman is the founder of Her Confidant, Australia’s only female-led agency providing curated intimate experiences for women and couples.

Get the Ultimate Sexual Wellness Bundle (all my resources/ebooks!!)

Want 10% off store products? Use code thatsorgasmic10

Submit your anonymous question for the podcast

Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

FOLLOW US on Instagram @thatsorgasmic
Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

Her Confidant Instagram

Her Confidant Website

Her Confidant LinkedIn

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Welcome to the first episode of Ask a Sexologist, where listeners send in their questions, stories and dilemmas, and Emily, a sex and relationship therapist, weighs in.

Today's episode explores catfishing.

Submit your anonymous question for the podcast

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Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

FOLLOW US on Instagram @thatsorgasmic
Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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Emily is joined by sexologist and sex educator Lex Nyree to unpack humiliation kinks. They cover what counts as humiliation versus degradation, why some people are drawn to it, and how to explore it without crossing into harm. The conversation also goes deep on consent, aftercare, and why having this kink does not automatically mean someone has low self-esteem.

Key topics

• Lex defines humiliation kink.
• Examples discussed include verbal humiliation, small penis humiliation, service humiliation, public embarrassment scenarios, forced feminisation, and financial domination.
• Emily and Lex discuss why humiliation kink can be appealing, including the release of control, novelty, sexual association developed over time, and accidental discovery through play.
• They discuss what it means to have a fantasy vs kink that is practised.
• Safety.
• Lex describes the experience of both submissives and dominants.
• They discuss how to bring up your humiliation kink with a partner.
• Does having a humiliation kink mean you have low self-esteem?

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Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

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Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

https://www.sexwithlex.com.au

Instagram @sexwithlexmelb

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In this episode, Emily explores how to spice up the missionary position. Missionary can get a bad rap, dismissed as boring or too vanilla, but it doesn't have to be. Emily shares 8 ways to bring more pleasure, connection and excitement into missionary, proving there's way more to this position than people give it credit for.

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Submit your anonymous question for the podcast

Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

FOLLOW US on Instagram @thatsorgasmic
Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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Why do we keep choosing the wrong partners — even when we know better? In this episode of That’s Orgasmic, Emily sits down with psychotherapist and professor Dr. Gillian O’Shea Brown to unpack the unconscious patterns that draw us toward emotionally unavailable relationships, familiar chaos, and unresolved wounds.

Together, they explore the idea of an “erotic emotional map,” how childhood attachment patterns can shape adult love lives, and why butterflies, adrenaline, and uncertainty can sometimes be misread as attraction. Gillian shares practical tools for noticing what a relationship brings out in you, including a simple body-based exercise and a post-date reflection practice that helps you track whether someone expands your sense of self or slowly erodes it.

If you’ve ever found yourself repeating the same relationship pattern, struggling to walk away, or wondering why calm love feels unfamiliar, this conversation offers compassionate insight and grounded guidance for choosing healthier, safer, and more reciprocal connection.

Get the Ultimate Sexual Wellness Bundle (all my resources/ebooks!!)

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Submit your anonymous question for the podcast

Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

FOLLOW US on Instagram @thatsorgasmic
Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

Pre-order Dr. Gillian O'Shea Brown's book now (with a preorder bonus of a sample chapter and the Erotic Emotional Map)

Take the Psychological Achilles Heel Quiz: https://gillianosheabrown.webflow.io/

Dr. Gillian's Instagram

Dr. Gillian's TikTok

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Think being good at sex comes from having lots of experience? Think again.

In this episode, I'm breaking down one of the biggest myths about sex: that the more sex you have had, the better you'll be in bed.

The truth is, great sex has everything to do with communication, curiosity, connection, and a willingness to learn.

We'll explore:
• Why sexual experience doesn't automatically make someone a better lover
• The qualities that actually make someone a great sexual partner
• How communication can transform your sex life
• Why slowing down often leads to more pleasure
• The importance of connection and aftercare
• Why porn isn't sex education
• Evidence-based resources to help you learn about pleasure, even if you've never had sex before

Get the Ultimate Sexual Wellness Bundle (all my resources/ebooks!!)

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Submit your anonymous question for the podcast

Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

FOLLOW US on Instagram @thatsorgasmic
Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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This episode explores the listener question, "I bought a toy and I'm honestly a little embarrassed about how much I like it more than partnered sex. Does that mean something's wrong?"

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Submit your anonymous question for the podcast

Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

FOLLOW US on Instagram @thatsorgasmic
Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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In this episode, Emily discusses a recent scary experience of a man asking for her number in public. Emily also discusses the different ways men have approached her in public, from the ok to the bad.

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Submit your anonymous question for the podcast

Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

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Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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There is no new episode this week, instead, enjoy this revisit to episode 134 How to eat pussy.

In this episode, I am joined by Jordana Ezra, a somatic sexologist specialising in LGBTIA+ sex. She is a bisexual lesbian, host of MOIST a sell-out queer speed dating event and founder of the pussy frequency a method devoted to women and non-binary coming out later in life.

Emily and Jordana discuss:

• Performance anxiety to eat pussy
• How to eat pussy
• How to practice pussy worshipping
• How to get to know your pussy
• Getting out of your head and into your body

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Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

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Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

To book a session with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre follow the link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com

JORDY'S INSTAGRAM

FREE PLEASURE MAPPING SESSION WITH JORDY

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Emily a sex and relationship therapist, discusses the most common behaviours that contribute to a bad sex life...they're more common than you'd think.

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Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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Apologies for the error in uploading the same episode for both part one and two of 'how to spice up masturbation: A Sex Therapist's top tips.

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Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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This episode is part one of two episodes - How to spice up masturbation: A Sex Therapist's top tips

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Submit your anonymous question for the podcast

Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

FOLLOW US on Instagram @thatsorgasmic
Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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Low desire? Disconnected from your body? Struggle to experience pleasure? This practical episode explores daily practices to connect to your sexuality.

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Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

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Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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This episode explores demand and non-demand intimacy. Emily explains what is happening when not only sex has decreased, but physical touch and intimacy have decreased too.

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Submit your anonymous question for the podcast

Anonymous question link: https://www.sexualwellnesscentre.com/podcast

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Send your comments, questions and stories to: emilyduncan@thatsorgasmic.com

Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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Get your copy of The Art of Initiation Ebook

Get your copy of The Art of Initiation Workbook

Get your copy of The Art of Initiation bundle Ebook + Workbook

Emotional Bank Account Podcast episode

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This episode explores the emotional bank account. A concept often discussed in therapy to determine the health of your relationship and how you can improve it.

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Interested in therapy? Book your free discovery call HERE with Emily at The Sexual Wellness Centre

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Overcome your erectile difficulties with my online self-paced course Overcoming Erectile Difficulties Program: How to obtain and maintain an erection

Get your copy of The Art of Initiation Ebook (How to initiate sex)

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Discount code for course: THATSORGASMIC

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If you want to track your erectile health use the link below to access the FirmTech Ring. A penile device that tracks your erections and can also be used as a cockring. https://myfirmtech.com/emilyduncan

Use the code: ThatsOrgasmic for 15% off.

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