U Up?

It’s a Happy Halloween here at the BETCHES studios with Jordana and Jared, who are dressed as a big baby and a praying mantis. They’re ranking Halloween costumes, from Hercules and Phil to Monica and Chandler in Barbados and more! J&J tell all singles in their 20s, 30s, and 40s what they need to be doing on Halloween night, and that’s finding a party!! Lastly, they bring back Awkward Encounter about a woman whose ex gets confronted by his new girlfriend, who asks her for a naughty Halloween party request.

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Jared and Jordana are reading The Cut’s new article, “The Case for the Entry-Level Boyfriend,” and discussing how maybe you should date someone who doesn’t check every box, and how, maybe, maybe, situationships can teach you more than you think! It’s Halloween week, and Jordana hopes doctors aren’t dressing up as Dracula and how a guy's Halloween costume can avoid giving you the ICK. They also discuss a fiancé who takes a bite out of a muffin top and puts it back, and a woman who refuses to call her girlfriend her girlfriend. Plus, is hearing your partner call their parents “mommy and daddy” an absolute deal breaker?!

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Jared and Jordana are diving into listener emails, and one is about an ex who still wants to join a football betting pool even after a breakup over Bad Bunny the day before an important abortion appointment. Another emailer asks J&J how to get out of a 14-year situationship with her ex’s parents, as they can’t stop calling her each year on her birthday. J&J suggest that she not cut ties just yet!

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Jordana and Jared learn that Tobey Maguire officiated his ex-wife’s wedding just weeks after finalizing their divorce, and they debate whether it’s sweet or just super weird. They then help a newly married listener who can’t fall asleep without listening to a podcast while her husband needs complete silence! J&J also answer questions about how to define the relationship and whether accepting a free drink while in a relationship is a red flag or a dealbreaker.

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Esther Perel is back to join Jordana and Jared to talk about AI girlfriends, if using AI to write a love letter is dishonest, and the real reason we are choosing our phones over in-person connection. J&J and Esther talk about friendship breakups and whether going to therapy with your friend will help. Plus, we get Esther Perel’s take on chores in the home. Does she end up agreeing with J&J’s dating advice?!

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This week, J&J learn that Hinge is banning screenshots, and they question whether this is good for dating or helps cheaters get away with it! They Jordana and Jared see a man who posted his divorce announcement with a thoughtful, brief FAQ and discuss whether all breakups should have posts like these. They then discuss if it’s weird to keep a list of everyone you’ve slept with, whether single friends should be invited to couples nights, and if it’s petty to refuse to treat your ex’s new baby. Lastly, they discuss being compared to an ex by your husband’s family and how many football leagues are too many to be apart of?!

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Jared and Jordana are learning about Instagram’s new blur feature for “soft launching” couples in their new segment, Are U Up to Date? They then answer a listener’s email about asking for an engagement ring back after years of marriage and whether it’s petty or prudent. Lastly, they help an unsure listener who doesn’t want a second big wedding, but her new fiancé, who has never been married, wants a big wedding to celebrate his family’s Chinese wedding traditions.

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Jordana and Jared are reading through a listener’s breakup texts, and the list of reasons to end it is long! A cozy cabin weekend in the woods was not as romantic as she thought, with complaints about restaurant choices, what time to go to the farmers market, and feeling judged for her kinks. J&J also get into the latest dating news, from Margot Robbie taking her husband’s last name after nearly 10 years of marriage to a $10 NYC dating photo booth that matches strangers using question surveys. Lastly, they get into family-related red flag dealbreakers, including a boyfriend who texts his girlfriend’s mom, a family that keeps the TV on all day, and if refusing to try your partner’s mom’s food is a dealbreaker.

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Heather McMahan joins Jordana & Jared to talk about living with her mom after becoming a newlywed and getting fired from the Ryder Cup! She talks about how meeting her husband in a gay bar made her feel love at first sight, and she shares her direct advice on how to pick a life partner! Lastly, they help give advice to a newly married couple with a baby on how to navigate living with their parents while being new parents themselves!

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It’s a rapid fire episode with 10 relationship questions from YOU, the listeners. Jordana and Jared answer questions about how long is too long to go without sex or a marriage proposal! They discuss whether high-drama baby mamas are worth it long-term, how to split chores at home, and how to combine finances. They also discuss trips, from honeymoons to splitting visits with the in-laws for the holidays, and how both can be stressful to plan! Lastly, they get into relationships outside your marriage and whether you can come back from emotional cheating or not. It’s a spicy rapid fire episode you don’t want to miss!

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It’s autumn, and Jordana & Jared are challenging their listeners to put down their phones, get out of the house, and talk to people! They then get into questions from you and decide if secretly hiding your partner’s ugly clothes is petty or prudent. Or just helpful?! Lastly, they help a woman decide whether or not to make a move on a guy 7 years her junior. Does age really matter?

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Jordana discovers her husband used an AI chat to help him write her birthday card, and she has some feelings about whether a love letter still counts when chat gpt edits it for you! Jared and Jordana then get into listener questions, answering a woman who found her husband texting an ex, whether busking on NYC streets is a red flag, and whether asking for a number before a date means something or if it’s okay to keep the chat on hinge. They also discuss Jared’s comedy special and how getting a message from David Schwimmer, yes, Ross Geller, was a career highlight!

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Jordana tells Jared how her vacation ended up being the busiest and most unrelaxing, but also the most fun, due to Ronnie the dog getting kicked out of boarding for peeing and joining the family’s chaotic Montauk trip! They then get into listener emails and discuss whether a partner should wait in the regular TSA line, what actually marks the end of the honeymoon phase, and whether small gestures like Trader Joe’s flowers matter more than big romantic moves. They also talk about a passionate “lake life” man who may have used his love of camping as an excuse to break up, and whether a fantasy football draft on your wife’s birthday is a red flag or deal breaker. We say yes!

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Jared and Jordana discovered that you can crash a wedding and think it’s the best way to spend a night out with someone you’re dating! From black-tie dress codes to open bars and live bands, it’d probably make the best eighth date. They also advise a listener to take a break from dating apps after he starts analyzing whether his spontaneous Bumble date will make a good mother. Too soon, buddy! Lastly, they discuss the awkward conversations that come with financially relying on your partner, including budgets, joint savings, debt, and what happens if you break up.

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It’s Jordana’s birthday, Happy Birthday, Jordana! J&J debate wedding plus-ones, jealous partners, and how much texting is too much when you’re dating. They also dive into a text thread discussion of a boyfriend fangirling over a professional tennis player and his girlfriend is getting the ICK! They then discuss if it's a red flag for a woman who spends five nights a week at salsa class, and whether you should stay friends with someone you cheated with!

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Lauren Lapkus joins Jordana and Jared to talk about dating actors, marriage, kids, and whether being good at acting makes someone too good at lying?? The three play red flag or deal breaker, asking Lauren on everything from an ex’s wedding dress to bad breath, Disney adults, and having a sexual fantasy about your date’s famous character!

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Jared shares about meeting his girlfriend’s friends, how he got questioned about his phone use, and how being in a relationship means meeting the friend group! Then J&J discuss how men really feel about losing a partner, how they would go about life after a partner’s death, how often your spouse should visit your grave, and whether remarrying too soon should get you written out of the will. They also discuss a husband lying about buying his ex a gift, stalking an ex’s IG stories, Disney Adult red flags, asking someone if they had a good time on a date, and whether shutting off your apartment’s electricity is a red flag or a deal breaker.

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Jordana and Jared watch a TikTok of a groom zip lining into his own wedding and debate whether a groom spending $24K is a major ICK. They then answer a question from a newly single mother who is nervous about dating again, and they call Jordana's mother! Jordana's mom is a gynecologist who has dated after divorce and raised 8 kids, and gives a lot of great advice this episode about getting back into dating, talking about your kids with your date, feeling confident and sexy again, and why a date should feel like a chance to get out of mommy mode! Plus, Dr. Lisa Rosenberg gives some VERY candid advice about keeping things fresh down there!

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Jordana and Jared discuss a dating app match who canceled a first date after there was a lull in texting and then sent practically a full dissertation explaining his communication style as if his date was in the wrong for not knowing. J&J also answer whether wearing an ex’s gift years later means you’re still thinking about them, if a co-ed bachelor party where partners aren’t invited is petty, and whether a filthy apartment is an instant deal breaker! Also Jared shares how he shares his upgrade on a flight with his girlfriend instead of taking it for himself – growth!!

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