ShrinkChicks

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen dive into mental load, parental burnout, and what it means to be the default parent. They explore the invisible work of running a family, from anticipating everyone’s needs to remembering, planning, and making sure things actually get done. They also unpack why saying “just give me a list” doesn’t always solve the problem, how overfunctioning can lead to underfunctioning, and why dividing responsibilities equitably means more than simply splitting tasks.

They answer listener questions about coparenting when one person carries most of the mental load, splitting responsibilities when one partner stays home or works remotely, and getting your partner to take ownership without being reminded. They also discuss maternal gatekeeping, navigating in-laws who don’t see the imbalance, and how personal growth can bring up complicated feelings about your own family and friendships in this week’s Dear Em & Jen.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 5 minutes to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

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Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Fits Everybody collection at http://skims.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Zenni: Give the gift of Zenni this holiday season: glasses, sunglasses, whatever they need. Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at http://freestyle.world/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Tumble: Machine Washable Rugs, Made Better. For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at http://tumbleliving.com/SHRINKCHICKS

Quince: Give the gift of quality this holiday season. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen are bringing you a full episode of Dear Em & Jen listener questions, diving into topics from career setbacks and complicated relationships to divorce, family tension, and trying to conceive after sexual trauma. They share what they’ve learned from building their own therapy practice, why failure is part of growth, and how comparison can get in the way not only of joy, but of growth too.

They discuss falling for someone who may not be compatible with your long-term goals, grieving a marriage while feeling hopeful about the future, and navigating family relationships that feel more performative than genuine. Along the way, they explore how to hold two seemingly conflicting feelings at once, stay grounded in your values, and build relationships that leave room for honesty, vulnerability, and change.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 8 minutes to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at http://freestyle.world/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Tumble: For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at http://tumbleliving.com/SHRINKCHICKS

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen dive into the difference between feeling overwhelmed and overstimulated, and what’s actually happening in your nervous system when everything suddenly feels like too much. They explore why some people become overstimulated more easily than others, how things like sleep, hunger, noise, stress, and hormones can affect your capacity, and why it can show up as anxiety, rage, panic, or shutdown.

They answer listener questions about what to do when your usual coping skills stop working, how to feel less scattered, managing a job that leaves you overwhelmed every day, and explaining overstimulation to a partner. They also discuss what to do when you’re on the verge of a panic attack, how to avoid taking your feelings out on other people, and why recognizing your own warning signs can help you step away before you reach your breaking point.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 4:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at http://freestyle.world/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Cozy Earth: Head to http://cozyearth.com and use our code SHRINKCHICKS for an exclusive 20% off home and sleepwear

Tumble: For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at http://tumbleliving.com/SHRINKCHICKS

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, we’re talking about sex, baby, and why everyone seems to be having less of it. The “sex recession” is a real thing, and Em and Jen are exploring how stress, lack of sleep, work, social media, and the constant stream of bad news can affect libido. Plus, the difference between spontaneous and responsive desire, and why improving your sex life might be less about adding more “gas” and more about taking your foot off the brakes.

They answer listener questions about mismatched sex drives, separating sex from emotional intimacy, navigating intimacy during pregnancy and while trying to conceive, and friends with benefits. They also discuss rebuilding a healthy sex life after an affair, sexual side effects from antidepressants, and why communication about what sex and intimacy actually mean to each partner matters.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 6 minutes to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at http://freestyle.world/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Cozy Earth: Head to http://cozyearth.com and use our code SHRINKCHICKS for an exclusive 20% off home and sleepwear

Tumble: For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at http://tumbleliving.com/SHRINKCHICKS

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk all about emotional flooding and why you might shut down, go blank, or struggle to find your words when you’re flooded. They explain what happens in your brain and body when your nervous system becomes overwhelmed, why shutting down can be a protective response, and how patterns that helped you growing up can follow you into adult relationships.

Your hosts answer listener questions about emotional flooding in therapy, functioning when you’re overwhelmed, and how to work on preventing shut down without relying on willpower alone. They also explore the difference between emotional flooding and stonewalling, how to communicate what’s happening to your partner, and discuss why taking a break during conflict can be an important part of staying connected.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 5 minutes to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at http://freestyle.world/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Cozy Earth: Head to http://cozyearth.com and use our code SHRINKCHICKS for an exclusive 20% off home and sleepwear

Tumble: For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at http://tumbleliving.com/SHRINKCHICKS

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen are joined by licensed clinical social worker and addiction expert Mike Blanche from Ethos Treatment to talk about how technology, social media, and AI are quickly changing our mental health and relationships. Mike shares what he’s seeing after more than 20 years in the field, including why turning to AI for emotional support or relationship advice can leave us missing the vulnerability, nuance, and connection that come from interacting with real people.

They explore how to recognize when technology use becomes an addiction, the impact of social media on our expectations of ourselves, and why constant digital distractions can make us miss the small moments that build relationships. Mike also shares how parents can teach kids healthier technology habits, why shame makes these conversations harder, and what AI can, and can’t, offer when it comes to therapy and human connection.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action!

Mentioned in today’s episode:

• The Anxious Generation
• The Social Dilemma documentary

You can find today’s guest by visiting http://ethostreatment.com.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at http://freestyle.world/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Cozy Earth: Head to http://cozyearth.com and use our code SHRINKCHICKS for an exclusive 20% off home and sleepwear

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen dive into mother-daughter relationships and why they can bring up some of our biggest emotions, even well into adulthood. They explore attachment, childhood wounds, differentiation, seeking your mom’s approval, and why one comment from your mother can somehow ruin your entire week.

They answer listener questions about setting boundaries, feeling guilty for not wanting a close relationship, dealing with a mother’s anxiety, accepting a relationship that isn’t emotionally intimate, and why we can feel both suffocated by and deeply attached to our moms. Your hosts also unpack why we’re often meanest to the people we feel safest with, how to handle a defensive mom, and what it looks like to stop seeking something from your mother that she may never be able to give you.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 6:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at http://freestyle.world/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk all about radical acceptance, a core DBT skill that involves fully acknowledging reality as it is, even when you don’t like it, agree with it, or think it’s fair. They explore how acceptance can actually create more freedom and make change possible, rather than meaning you’re giving up.

They answer listener questions about radical acceptance vs. settling and minimization, accepting something you’re still angry about, and whether you can accept someone without accepting or condoning their behavior. They also discuss patience, grief, anxiety, panic, and what it means to accept a reality that wasn’t your fault but is still yours to navigate.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 7:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at http://freestyle.world/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Emmalee and Jen are throwing it back to an episode from 2024, Building Self-Confidence. This was one of their top episodes, and during this holiday weekend, they wanted to re-release it to share tips and tricks that can help you build self-confidence and self-esteem. They discuss why doing something new can trigger feelings of insecurity, self-confidence and mastery, how to know if your inner critic is right or wrong, building self-confidence with a core wound of unworthiness, how to validate yourself, when people's opinions matter vs. when they don’t, and so much more!

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 6:45 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at http://freestyle.world/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk all about emotionally immature parents and in-laws, the boundaries that can get blurry in family relationships, and how to protect your peace without losing yourself. They explore why understanding emotional immaturity and childhood emotional neglect can be so validating, especially when family members see the relationship very differently than you do.

They answer listener questions about setting boundaries with in-laws, navigating a partner’s relationship with their parents, witnessing unhealthy family dynamics, and breaking patterns when both partners grew up with emotionally immature parents. Along the way, they get into lowering expectations, sharing less, and figuring out what parts of yourself feel safe to bring into difficult family relationships.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 5:45 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to http://ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Tumble: For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at tumbleliving.com/SHRINKCHICKS

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk about being the partner of someone struggling with mental health, or being the partner struggling, and what it’s like to navigate mental illness within a relationship. They explore the balance between supporting a partner and overfunctioning for them, while recognizing that fairness doesn’t always mean doing the same exact things. They also discuss how relationships can evolve as each person’s needs, capacity, and mental health change over time.

They answer listener questions about depression, ADHD, BPD, mental load, guilt, and boundaries, and discuss how to ask for more progress without making your partner feel unsupported. Along the way, they explore why support and expectations can coexist, how to recognize when you’re becoming someone’s treatment plan, and how to protect your own needs while showing up for someone you love.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 5:15 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to http://ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Tumble: For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at tumbleliving.com/SHRINKCHICKS

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, we’re talking all about jealousy. Where does it actually come from, and what do you do with it? Your hosts dive into jealousy at every angle; anxious attachment and reassurance-seeking, why checking a partner's ex's Instagram feeds the monster instead of starving it, and how to build real security instead of chasing a certainty that doesn't exist. Some people barely feel jealousy at all, and that gets explored too, including whether it might tie back to avoidant attachment.

Listener questions cover picking fights over an ex, the fear of being "replaceable" with a partner's friends or coworkers, jealousy tied to fertility and IVF, and the sting of being treated differently than a sibling-in-law. There's a breakdown of Sue Johnson's A.R.E. framework for building security in a relationship, plus what to do when a parent's infidelity makes it hard to trust a partner who's never given a reason not to be trusted. Dear Em & Jen goes past jealousy entirely: the shame of not feeling happy for other people, and where that reflex really comes from.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 3:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to http://ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Tumble: Machine Washable Rugs, Made Better. For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at tumbleliving.com/SHRINKCHICKS

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen take on a common yet difficult relationship question: how do you know when it's time to stay and fight for a relationship, versus when it's time to leave? They break down discernment counseling, a specific, structured approach to help you get clarity, and explore why "enough" is rarely one big event. The hosts dig into the difference between loyalty and self-erosion, why "if you can't handle me at my worst" is a myth we should retire, and what it actually means to love someone with accountability.

Plus, Em and Jen answer listener questions on emotional neglect without an obvious "problem," discuss why healthy relationships are sometimes boring in the best way, how to gently tell a friend they deserve better, and how to support someone through infidelity or a years-long fence-sit. In Dear Em & Jen, they respond to a listener carrying decade-old shame over an affair and how to navigate moving forward.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 8 minutes to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to http://ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order plus free shipping on all US orders over $65

Tumble: For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at http://tumbleliving.com/SHRINKCHICKS

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen celebrate the many ways therapy can change your life by sharing powerful stories and wins from the ShrinkChicks community as well as themselves. From learning to regulate emotions and set healthier boundaries to receiving long-awaited diagnoses and building stronger relationships, this episode highlights the lasting impact that therapy can have.

They discuss why the relationship with your therapist matters so much, how therapy creates the space to respond instead of react, and why healing often opens doors far beyond your mental health. Listener stories touch on OCD diagnoses, finding self-acceptance, becoming a better partner, pursuing careers in therapy, and simply surviving life's hardest moments. The episode wraps with a conversation about grieving a former career while still feeling confident in the life you've chosen today.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action!

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

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Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to http://ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk about the hard conversations that come with every stage of a relationship and why they're never just a one-time discussion. From marriage and finances to kids, careers, family dynamics, and major life transitions, they explore how healthy relationships require ongoing communication as life continues changing.

They answer listener questions about bringing up a prenup, navigating seasons of sacrifice, deciding whether you're ready for kids, asking for help during uncertain life transitions, and telling a partner you want to leave a stable, high-paying job. Along the way, they discuss how fear shapes relationship decisions, why sacrifice only works when it's appreciated, and how to approach difficult conversations as teammates instead of opponents.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 7:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to http://ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen dive into what it really means to fight fairly in relationships and how conflict can actually bring couples closer when it’s handled well. They explore the difference between productive conflict and escalation, and why learning how you and your partner argue is just as important as learning how you love.

The conversation breaks down common conflict mistakes like bringing up the past, using blame or contempt, and not taking a pause when feeling activated. Em and Jen also discuss how to regulate your nervous system in real time, when to take a break during a fight, and how to repair after disagreement, especially in front of kids or when emotions are high. Listener questions cover how to stay grounded when you feel unheard, how to introduce healthier conflict tools to a partner who isn’t used to them, and what to do when insecurities get activated in the middle of an argument. The episode centers on one core question: in moments of conflict, do you want to be right, or do you want to be close?

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 5:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

Book mentioned in today’s episode: How to Be an Adult in Relationships

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to http://ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen unpack insecurities: where they come from, why everyone has them, and how they quietly shape our relationships, careers, and sense of self. They explore the connection between insecurity and hyper-independence, why asking for help can feel so uncomfortable, and how comparison culture can keep us stuck.

They also answer listener questions about needing reassurance in relationships, feeling hurt when someone's energy changes, worrying people won't like the "real" you, and what to do when you realize past choices were driven by insecurity instead of authenticity. Along the way, they discuss attachment, vulnerability, self-compassion, and how healing begins by challenging the stories we've carried for years.

The Still Face Experiment mentioned in today’s episode: https://www.gottman.com/blog/research-still-face-experiment/

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 6 minutes to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to http://ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this rewind episode of ShrinkChicks, Emmalee and Jen welcome Nedra Glover Tawwab back to the podcast! Nedra is a licensed therapist, a New York Times Bestselling author, and an expert on relationships and boundaries. If you haven’t followed her on Instagram yet, go do it now! They start the episode off by talking about Nedra's book, Consider This. Then, Nedra answers your questions about emotionally immature people and boundaries. She covers topics like navigating the emotionally immature parent/child relationship as an adult, how to know if you're the emotionally immature one, setting boundaries with people who say "it's not that deep," appeasing to avoid conflict, and so much more! Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action!

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to http://ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk about adult sibling relationships and why growing up in the same family doesn't always mean growing up with the same experience. They explore how family roles, parentification, favoritism, and changing family dynamics can shape sibling relationships long after childhood.

They answer listener questions about feeling responsible for younger siblings, navigating resentment toward a "golden child" sibling, and having difficult conversations without blame. They also discuss what happens when your emotional growth outpaces your family, how to avoid getting pulled into triangulation, and why siblings often experience the same parents in completely different ways.

The conversation also covers the eldest daughter dynamic, repairing relationships after years of distance, and how to let go of roles that may have helped you survive childhood but no longer serve you as an adult.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 10:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

Link to Siblings Without Rivalry book mentioned

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!=

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep with Boll & Branch. Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at http://bollandbranch.com/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Skims: Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of our favorite bras and underwear at

http://www.skims.com/shrinkchicks. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at http://shopify.com/shrinkchicks

Perelel: New customers can use code SHRINKCHICKS to get 20% off their first order at http://perelelhealth.com/shrinkchicks

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

GreenChef: Head toGreenchef.com/50shrinkchicks and use code 50shrinkchicks to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months with free shipping

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen unpack the difference between compromise and settling in relationships, and why the line between them can feel so confusing sometimes. They explore how compromise is typically preference-based and healthy within a relationship, while settling often involves self-abandonment, avoidance, or giving up core parts of yourself.

The two answer listener questions about how to tell the difference in real time, what to do if you realize you’ve settled after the fact, and how social media highlight reels can distort our perception of our own relationships. They also dive into patterns of one-sided compromise, unconscious “relationship contracts,” and whether it’s possible to love someone deeply while still grieving what the relationship isn’t.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 8:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep with Boll & Branch. Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at http://bollandbranch.com/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Skims: Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of our favorite bras and underwear at

http://www.skims.com/shrinkchicks. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at http://shopify.com/shrinkchicks

Perelel: New customers can use code SHRINKCHICKS to get 20% off their first order at http://perelelhealth.com/shrinkchicks

Zenni: Go to http://zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

GreenChef: Head toGreenchef.com/50shrinkchicks and use code 50shrinkchicks to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months with free shipping

Quince: Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.